


Spectral's insane and INCREDIBLY evil Zoids Show

by Spectral



Category: Zoids
Genre: Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2002-11-01
Updated: 2003-10-15
Packaged: 2013-05-07 20:42:46
Rating: T
Chapters: 12
Words: 27,984
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/1041997/1/
Author URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/u/123473/Spectral
Summary: The Real Chapter 12 is finally here!Mix Spectral, characters from all FOUR zoids series, and a studio audence and what do you get? That's right, complete and total insanity.





	1. Harry Champ and Irvine

**Spectral's Evil and Insane Zoids Themed Talk Show Type Show**

****

By, Spectral

Insanity comes in many forms this is one of the more pleasant ones…

**Disclaimer: Spectral doesn't own zoids or its characters. He owns this story and its plot but not Zoids or it characters. **

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Mr. Censor: Live from a studio somewhere in Limbo, it's Spectral's Zoid Themed Talk Show! Here's your host, Spectral!**

            Spectral appeared in a cloud of smoke. The audience applauded. Spectral tried to quiet them but they wouldn't stop. He tried again with no progress. The audience quickly became silent when Spectral pulled a flamethrower out of subspace.

**Spectral: Thank you, thank you. Well I've come up with some sort of talk show-like show. It will feature Zoids characters from all three series, some zoid battles, zombies, explosions, maniacal laughter, insanity, and some other zoid related stuff that I'll make up as we go along. That sound good?**

**Audience: Yes!**

**One guy in Audience: No!**

**Spectral: Seize him! **

            Two robots flew from above grabbed the guy out of the audience and then carried him back into the shadows. There was an explosion and the audience looked at each other nervously.

**Spectral: Will we have any more problems?**

            The audience shook their heads and Spectral walked over to a desk that had appeared out of no where. He sat down behind it and a panel opened up on the arm of his chair revealing several different buttons.

**Spectral: Okay, Mr. Censor, who's our first guest?**

**Mr. Censor: I don't know.**

**Spectral: What?**

**Mr. Censor: We didn't book anyone…**

**Spectral: Then spin the wheel of guests!**

**Mr. Censor: Okaaay…**

            A large wheel with several pictures, words, and names on it dropped from above. Mr. Censor spun the wheel and it landed on…

**Mr. Censor: Taco?**

**Audience: Taco?**

            A taco appeared on a chair next to Spectral's desk. 

**Spectral: Spin the wheel again please…but first, who wants the taco?**

**_Large woman in audience: I do!_**

**Spectral: Very well…**

            Spectral picked the taco up and then threw it into the audience. There was a small explosion but several robots rushed out and repaired the damage.

**Spectral: Now do we have a real guest?  
****Mr. Censor: Yes, it's Harry Champ.**

**Spectral: Okay. Minions! Bring me Harry Champ!**

            Two robots flew through a dimensional portal. About a minute later they returned with Harry Champ. The audience clapped as Harry was dropped in his chair.

**Spectral: Hello Harry. Did you agree to come on the show or did the robots have to persuade you? **

**Harry: I agreed to come with them.**

**Spectral: Okay. Well first I've got some questions for you. Is it true that you're "A man Destined to be King"?**

**Harry: Yes. I'm Harry Champ, A Man Destined to be King!**

**Spectral: King of what?**

**Harry: I'm not quite sure… no one ever told me. Everyone back home just kept saying that I was a man destined to be king.**

**Spectral: Oh…well…why do you have so many zooids if you only use two?**

**Harry: Just to show that I can have all the zoids I want.**

**Spectral: Is it also true that you once defeated an army of zombies with nothing but a #2 pencil?**

**Harry: No.**

**Spectral: Would you like to try?**

**Harry: Isn't it a little dangerous?**

**Spectral: If you can survive you'll win Leena…**

**Harry: Bring on the zombies!**

**Spectral: Very well, it's time for… ****SUPER ZOMBIE MELEE!**

            The audience began to cheer as Spectral pushed a button. The studio floor began to open up and a large graveyard-like enclosure rose from the ground. Mr. Censor walked over, handed Harry a pencil, and then opened the door to the graveyard. Harry walked in and stood on a red Q in the middle of the graveyard. The door closed and the walls were electrified. Several zombies began to rise from the ground.

**Spectral: We'll see if Harry survives after the commercial break.**

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**E-307: Having problems with the bully at school? Being terrorized by evil clowns? Having romance problems? Well we have the Solution to your problems! Just Call Spectral! He'll fix up the problem, just watch!**

**School**

            A small kid is getting pushed around by a bully. The kid then pushes a button on his watch. Spectral appears in a cloud of smoke and taps the bully on the shoulder.

**Bully: What do you want?**

**Spectral: Stop picking on him.**

**Bully: Make me!**

**Spectral: Okay.*snaps fingers***

            The GenoBreaker appears behind Spectral and begins to charge the charged particle cannon. The Bully runs away screaming.

**Random location**

            Several evil clowns are dancing around a group of old people. One of them pushes a button on her walker. The Death Saurer appears out of nowhere with Spectral on its shoulder. It began to fire the Charged Particle Cannon as the clowns ran in terror.

**E-307: Sorry but Spectral can't help with your romance problems. Remember, if you need a problem solved quickly or some massive destruction caused just call Spectral!**

Warning, Spectral may cause massive destruction.

**Spectral: And we're back! Harry actually survived the zombies!**

**Audience: What?**

**Spectral: Let's see what Harry has to say.**

            A very battered and bruised Harry Champ is sitting in the chair next to Spectral's desk.   
  


**Spectral: What was it like fighting with all those zombies?**

**Harry: Painful.**

**Spectral: Well you did survive, so as promised, you get Leena.**

            Harry jumped out of his chair, instantly healed, ready to meet his Leena. Spectral just handed him a Leena plush toy. 

**Harry: Wh-what's this? I thought you said you would give me Leena!**

**Spectral: Yes, but I never said I'd give you the real Leena, now did I?**

**Harry: But…**

**Spectral: SILENCE! Go hang out back stage; we'll call you for a zoid battle later.**

**Harry: But…**

            Two robots hover down from above and carry Harry backstage. The audience cheers and becomes quiet as Spectral picks up a flamethrower.

**Spectral: Okay, Mr. Censor, who's the next guest?**

**Mr. Censor: Well, I spun the wheel and it landed someone.**

**Spectral: Who?**

**Mr. Censor: Irvine.**

**Spectral: Very well. Minions! Bring me Irvine!**

            Two robots flew into a dimensional portal and returned a short while later returned with Irvine. They dropped him in a chair next to Spectral's desk. He immediately tried to run away but the robots threw him back into the chair.

**Spectral: Hello Irvine.**

**Irvine: What's going on? I told these glorified toasters to get lost!**

**Spectral: You were invited to be on this show.**

**Irvine: I didn't want to be on this stupid show!**

**Spectral: You don't really have a choice.**

            Spectral pressed a button and the floor began to open again. This time it revealed a pit of rabid fan-girls.

**Spectral: Cooperate or I drop you down there.**

            Irvine looked at the pit of rabid fan-girls and then back at Spectral. He sighed and turned to the audience.

**Irvine: Okay, I'll stay.**

**Audience: *cheers***

**Spectral: *Death Glare***

**Audience: *silence***

**Spectral: Okay, so…the first question we have for you is: Where'd you get that eye -patch?**

**Irvine: I had it custom made.**

**Spectral: Your last name wouldn't happen to be Hunter would it?**

**Irvine: No. I don't have a last name. Just Irvine.**

**Spectral: Okay, well which zoid did you like better? The Command Wolf or the Lightning Siax?**

**Irvine: The Lightning Siax is the Command Wolf in a new form.'**

**Spectral: Ah-ha. Well before we let you go, you'll be taking part in a zoid battle with our other guest.**

            Spectral pressed yet another button and the wall behind him began to open up, revealing an arena. Inside the arena were The Lightning Siax and Harry's Dark Horn. A Dark Judge Capsule rose from the ground on the fall wall.

            Robots picked up Irvine and flew him over to his zoid. Harry was already waiting in his zoid. The Dark Judge capsule opened and The Lightning Siax activated.

**Dark Judge: Area scanned. Battlefield set-up! Irvine vs. Harry Champ. Battle-Mode none. Ready…FIGHT!**

*BOOM*

            The Dark Horn fell to the ground, two smoking holes in its side. The Lightning Siax's cannon's were also smoking.

**Dark Judge: Battle over, battle over. The winner is…Irvine.**

**Spectral: Well that went faster than expected…Thanks for showing up on the show guys. See ya.**

            Dimensional portals opened under both zooids and they were transported back to where they were supposed to be. The walls closed and Spectral turned back to the audience.

**Spectral: Well that's all for today's show. Next time we'll have Ambient and Sebastian on the show. If you have any questions for these two characters, send them in. See ya next time. *disappears in a cloud of smoke***

**Audience: *cheers***

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Next Time: 

Ambient and Sebastian.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What did you people think of this insane idea? If you have any questions for Ambient, Sebastian, Mr. Censor, or myself send them in. They'll be answered them in the next chapter!


	2. Ambient and Sebastian

**Spectral's Evil and Insane Zoids Themed Talk Show Type Show**

****

By, Spectral

Insanity comes in many forms this is one of the more pleasant ones…

**Disclaimer: Spectral doesn't own zoids or its characters. He owns this story and its plot but not Zoids or it characters. **

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Mr. Censor: Live from a studio somewhere in Limbo, it's Spectral's Zoid Themed Talk Show! Here's your host, Spectral!**

            Spectral appeared in a cloud of smoke. The audience applauded. Spectral tried to quiet them but they wouldn't stop. He tried again with no progress. The audience quickly became silent when Spectral pulled a flamethrower out of subspace.

**Spectral: Thank you, thank you. Well I've come up with some sort of talk show-like show. It will feature Zoids characters from all three series, some zoid battles, zombies, explosions, maniacal laughter, insanity, and some other zoid related stuff that I'll make up as we go along. That sound good?**

**Audience: Yes!**

**One guy in Audience: No!**

**Spectral: *presses button***

            The floor under the one guy opened and he slid into the pit of rabid fan-girls. The floor closed as screams of terror were heard. Spectral walked over to his desk and sat down. The control panel opened up revealing several switches and buttons.

**Spectral: Okay. Our first guest for today is Sebastian. MINIONS! Retrieve Sebastian!**

**Sebastian: Hello.**

**Spectral: !!! DON'T DO THAT!**

**Sebastian: Very well. **

**Spectral: Okay…we have some questions for you and then we're going to play a game.**

**Sebastian: Then ask your questions.**

**Spectral: The first question is from BecBet, What do you really think of Harry?**

**Sebastian: Harry's my friend. He built Benjamin and myself when he was younger. He may be a bit crazy but he's around when we need him.**

**Spectral: Ah ha… well now you get questions from me… Why does your Heldigunner have two giant Gojalas cannons on it? They just slow your zoid down and don't seem to be effective…**

**Sebastian: It was Harry's idea and the cannons are effective. How can two giant cannons NOT be effective?**

**Spectral: Good point. Is it true that you were once a blender?**

**Sebastian: No! I was never a blender!**

**Spectral: Is that so? Well…it's time for the game.**

**Sebastian: Okay. What kind of a game is it?**

**Spectral: ****Super Robot Melee!**

**Audience: *cheers***

**Spectral: *holds up grenade***

**Audience: *silence***

            Spectral threw the grenade over his shoulder and it exploded somewhere backstage. The host then pressed a button and the wall behind his desk opened revealing an arena. Two demons picked Sebastian up and threw him into the arena.

**Sebastian: What is ****Super Robot Melee?**

**Audience: *Cheers***

**Spectral: *picks up bazooka***

**Audience: *silence***

**Spectral: Four robots go in, battle, and one emerges victorious.**

**Sebastian: I have to fight other robots?**

**Spectral: Yes.**

**Sebastian: No. There is no way that I am going to fight with another ro…*notices bazooka pointed at him* bot…**

**Spectral: Here are your opponents…**

            Four holes open in the arena floor and three robots rise from them. One is a small egg shaped robot with a blinking red light on it. Another is a standard V-Series Spectral Assault Robot, and the last is a 50-Foot Tall planetary raider robot.

**Spectral: In this fight anything goes. You have till we get back from the commercial break to fight. Ready…COMERCIAL! I mean FIGHT!**

===============================================================

**Demon Notebook: Hey! Do you need some sort of massive destruction caused? Is there a giant robot attacking your planet? Rampaging Monsters destroying your city? Fire-Breathing Dragons ruining your weekend? Well I can't help you with those problems, but I can sell you a car. That's right, here at DN's Discount Cars you can get a car, truck, motorcycle, helicopter, boat, or almost any other mode of transportation at a low price! You don't leave without a new vehicle or third degree burns. DN's Discount cars located in the Fiery Underworld, just past exit 666!**

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

**Spectral: And we're back! The winner of the fight was the Egg-O Bot! *Holds up little egg shaped robot with blinking red light* Sebastian didn't fare as well…*throws Egg-O Bot into a dimensional portal***

            Two zombies carry a box containing what's left of Benjamin out of the arena and backstage. 

  
**Spectral: What are we going to do while we wait for out next guest?**

**Mr. Censor: You could always answer the questions people asked you.**

**Spectral: People asked me questions? Okay. Let's here 'em!**

**Mr. Censor: Very well. The first one is from Shadow Liger who wants to know when Shadow will be on the show. **

**Spectral: Shadow? Check back CH5 for Shadow.**

**Mr. Censor: And this one is from Fire Fox. She wants to know when Raven will be on the show.**

**Spectral: Raven will be on the show once I figure out how to Fan-Girl Proof the studio. **

**Mr. Censor: That's all. **

**Spectral: Really? Oh well…*looks at watch* our next guest should be here is 5…4…3…2…1…**

            Ambient appeared in the chair next to Spectral's desk and looked around. The organoid seemed very confused.

**Spectral: Hi Ambient!**

            Ambient was startled. He turned and growled at Spectral. He then made several organoid type noises. No one had any idea what he just said.

**Spectral: Okay, can we get a translator out here?!**

**Mr. Censor: No, but we do have the translator machine.**

**Spectral: Then bring that out!**

**Mr. Censor: Okaaaay…**

            Mr. Censor carried a strange machine out onto the stage and set it down on Spectral's desk. He hooked a microphone up to it and pointed the microphone at Ambient. 

**Spectral: This is the translator machine I invented last Thursday! It will let us understand Ambient. **

**Audience: Oh…**

**Ambient: *translator activated!* what's going on? Where is this!?**

**Spectral: This is the *insert title here* Show! You're our second guest of the day!**

**Ambient:???**

**Spectral: Just answer the questions I ask you…**

**Ambient: Okay. **

**Spectral: Our first question is from someone you know. Biowolf wants to know what it's like living with Hiltz.**

**Ambient: Well when Hiltz isn't running away from Biowolf, and we're not fighting the Guardian Force, life is kinda boring. Eat, sleep, plan, save Hiltz from falling off a cliff when he's _trying to be evil, argue._**

**Spectral: Interesting…Out next question is from Fire Fox! She wants to know what it's like pushing a zoid to its ultimate potential when you merge with it.**

**Ambient: I don't really push a zoid to its Ultimate Potential. I just greatly increase its abilities. But anyway… its still fun to watch the scared little pilots see a zoid transform to a more terrifying shape right before their eyes.**

**Spectral: Creepy. Speaking of creepy, our next question is from Hades, lord of the underworld. His question is: If you could be any type of candy, what would you be?**

**Ambient: Chocolate Bar!**

**Spectral: Okaaaaaaaay…we're out of questions but I do have a surprise for you…**

**Ambient: Really? What is it?**

**Spectral: This! *presses button***

            A net lifted Ambient into the air. The Audience gasped in surprise and Mr. Censor just rolled his eyes. (Hey! That rhymes!) 

**Spectral: MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I've captured Ambient! Only three more Organoids left till they're all mine! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!**

            A crumpled up piece of paper flew from nowhere and hit Spectral in the head. He picked up the paper and opened it.

**Spectral: Who dares interrupt my evil moment?!?!?!?**

            The paper had a name on it. It was Hiltz.

**Spectral: Hiltz?!? Why did Hiltz throw a paper ball at me!?!?**

            Another paper flew from nowhere and hit Spectral he picked up and opened this paper as well.

**Spectral: *reading the paper aloud* "I threw the paper ball at you to cause a distraction and give me enough time to escape with Ambient. Signed, Hiltz." *anger* WHAT!?!?! **

            Spectral looked over at the net that was supposed to contain Ambient to see it had been cut open. Hiltz and Ambient were currently escaping through a door just off stage.

**Spectral: *presses button* Get back here!  
  
**

            Spectral jumped out of his chair and into the Egg Walker. HE then charged after Ambient and Hiltz. They closed the door behind them and Spectral crashed through the wall.

**Mr. Censor: Well that's the end of today's show… next time we have Moonbay and the Dark Judge…**

===============================================================

Next Time:

Moonbay and the Dark Judge


	3. Moonbay and the Dark Judge

**Spectral's Evil and Insane Zoids Themed Talk Show Type Show**

****

By, Spectral

Insanity comes in many forms this is one of the more pleasant ones…

**Disclaimer: Spectral doesn't own zoids or its characters. He owns this story and its plot but not Zoids or it characters. **

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Mr. Censor: Live from a studio somewhere in Limbo, it's Spectral's Zoid Themed Talk Show! Here's your host, Spectral!**

            Spectral appeared in a cloud of smoke. The audience applauded. Spectral tried to quiet them but they wouldn't stop. He tried again with no progress. The audience quickly became silent when Spectral pulled a flamethrower out of subspace.

**Spectral: Thank you, thank you. Well I've come up with some sort of talk show-like show. It will feature Zoids characters from all three series, some zoid battles, zombies, explosions, maniacal laughter, insanity, and some other zoid related stuff that I'll make up as we go along. That sound good?**

**Audience: Yes!**

**One guy in Audience: No!**

**Spectral: *presses button***

            The one guy in the audience is catapulted through the roof. Spectral goes and sits behind his desk. 

**Spectral: Who keeps letting that guy back in?**

**Mr. Censor: Don't know.**

**Spectral: Okay…well before we bring out our first guest…does the audience have anything they'd like to ask or say?  
  
**

            Several people in the audience raise their hands. Spectral scans the crowd and chooses one person.

**Person: Why do you always cause your guests pain? It's just wrong.**

**Spectral: You don't like when I hurt the guests? Well how about I hurt you instead? *pushes button***

            The floor opened and a large dragon rose out of the hole. It roared then looked at the person in the audience. It opened its mouth and fired a stream of fire and acid at the person. The charred and burnt person fell back into their seat. The dragon returned to the hole in the floor.

**Spectral: Any more questions or comments? None? Good. Let's bring out our first guest, Moonbay!**

            Two robots fly into a dimensional portal and return a few moments later with Moonbay. The transporter walks over and sits in a chair next to Spectral's desk.

**Spectral: Hi Moonbay!**

**Moonbay: Hello.**

**Spectral: The first question we have for you is from…*looks at card*…Becbet. She wants to know what's with that song you always sing.**

**Moonbay: It's my theme song. I have to sing it. Besides…the radio in my Gustav broke and I forgot to get it fixed so I provide my own music.**

**Spectral: Oh…well…our next question is from HealerAriel. She wants to know if there's anything going on between you and Irvine.**

**Moonbay: ! There's nothing going on between me and Irvine…really…*shifty glance***

**Spectral: Oh really? If you say so…our next question is from…me. Why did you quit racing sinkers? That looked like fun.**

**Moonbay: It got too easy to win. I got bored.**

**Spectral: Okay. That's all the questions for now. Hang out backstage for awhile and there'll be a game later.**

**Moonbay: Okay.**

**Spectral: We'll be back after this commercial break.**

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Spectral: Coming soon to a computer near you… A warrior shrouded in mystery. His intentions unknown. He stalks the Blitz Team through the shadows. Is he friend or foe? Find out in…**

Darkness on the Battlefield; Enter the Phantom

A fic brought to you by Spectral Inc.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Spectral: We're back but our guest isn't here yet…**

**Mr. Censor: We have questions for you….**

**Spectral: Then ask them…**

**Mr. Censor: Very well. Fire fox wants to know: "So are you saying that when Raven is actually on the show, I won't be able to come?"**

**Spectral: You'll be able to come…I meant once I figure out how to keep the dangerous rabid fan-girls out…the ones that just keep coming back no matter how many times they are destroyed…**

**Mr. Censor: That's all the questions for you. *looks up* Incoming…**

**Spectral: What?**

  
            The Dark Judge capsule crashed through the roof and got stuck. It opened and the Dark Judge jumped out. He took a seat next to Spectral's desk and the capsule blasted back into space. Several robots appeared and fixed the studio. Spectral got up from under his desk and turned to the Dark Judge.

**Spectral: Next time use the door…or a dimensional portal. Just don't crash through the roof!**

**Dark Judge: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA…*notices angry army of robots just off stage* HAHaha…**

**Spectral: Okay. Well we've got questions for you and the first one is from Fire Fox. She wants to know why the Backdraft Group isn't more evil like Raven or Hiltz.**

**Dark Judge: Why would I know? I spend most of my days up in a satellite. The most I ever get to do is the "Area scanned…battlefield set up. The Blitz Team vs. the Gold Team. Battle mode, 0999. Ready…FIGHT!" Thing. No one tells me anything…**

**Spectral: Well then…we have a question from Hades, lord of the Underworld. He wants to know, when you were a little robot what did you want to be when you grew up.**

**Dark Judge: Is there something wrong with him?**

**Spectral: Yes.**

**Dark Judge: I was never a "little robot" I was built in a factory and almost immediately sent out to officiate my first battle.**

**Spectral: Okay. It's time for a game!**

            Two robots carried Moonbay on stage and dropped her in a chair next to the Dark Judge.

**Spectral: This is a little trivia game… I'm going to ask you random questions and you have to answer them. Get them wrong and … let's just say that won't be fun. First question is for the Dark Judge… What is the name of Hiltz's Organoid?**

**Dark Judge: Ambient.**

**Spectral: Moonbay, Who is the pilot of the Berserk Fury?**

**Moonbay: Vega.**

**Spectral: Dark Judge, who pilots the Geno Breaker?  
****Dark Judge: Hiltz!**

**Spectral: WRONG! You lose! *pushes button***

            The Dark Judge was picked up by two robots and placed on a large red Q in the center of the stage. He looked up and a refrigerator dropped on him. The robots began to clean the mess up.

  
**Spectral: Okay, get this right and you win, Moonbay. What is the name of the Liger Zero's Green CAS?**

**Moonbay: Jager.**

**Spectral: WRONG! Good bye. *pushes button***

            Moonbay's chair spun around and she was catapulted through an open window.

**Spectral: That's all for now! Next time we'll have Raven and Leon the show.**

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Raven and Leon


	4. Raven and Leon Taros

**Spectral's Evil and Insane Zoids Themed Talk Show Type Show**

****

By, Spectral

Insanity comes in many forms this is one of the more pleasant ones…

**Disclaimer: Spectral doesn't own zoids or its characters. He owns this story and its plot but not Zoids or it characters. **

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Mr. Censor: Live from a studio somewhere in Limbo, it's Spectral's Zoid Themed Talk Show! Here's your host, Spectral!**

            Spectral appeared in a cloud of smoke. The audience applauded. Spectral tried to quiet them but they wouldn't stop. He tried again with no progress. The audience quickly became silent when Spectral pulled a flamethrower out of subspace.

**Spectral: Thank you, thank you. Well I've come up with some sort of talk show-like show. It will feature Zoids characters from all three series, some zoid battles, zombies, explosions, maniacal laughter, insanity, and some other zoid related stuff that I'll make up as we go along. That sound good?**

**Audience: Yes!**

**One guy in Audience: No!**

**Spectral: *picks up new bazooka/ smoke discharger that was a gift from Becbet (thanks for the weapon!)* I've had just about enough of you.**

BOOM

            Spectral walked over to his desk and sat down. The control panel opened and Spectral turned to the crowd.

**Spectral: Today we have two guests that will cause a lot of trouble. Leon…**

**Audience: *cheers***

**Spectral: and Raven.**

**Audience: *more and louder cheers***

**Spectral: Now… to keep you from harming them or me, especially me, we've stepped up security. Mr. Censor, if you will…**

            Mr. Censor threw a watermelon out in front of the audience. Suddenly there was a swarm of robots that flew from the shadows and blasted the melon to dust. The robots then sink back into the darkness.

**Spectral: Those were my new A-Series Security Robots. They should keep things in order. Now it's time to bring out our first guest…Leon.**

**Audience: *Cheers***

**Spectral: *eyes glow***

**Audience: *silence***

            Two heavily armed robots opened the studio door and screams and cannon fire were heard. Two more robots carried a box in and flew it to the stage. A rabid fan-girl armed with a sigh rushed in and ran towards the stage. The robots tried to stop her but she just kept trying to get to the stage. Suddenly she was blasted out the door. The robots immediately slammed and locked the door. Spectral lowered his smoking hand and sat back down.

**Spectral: Having energy blasts is a good thing. I suppose Leon's in the box.**

**Mr. Censor: Yep.**

**Spectral: *opens box* Hello.**

**Leon: *steps out of box and sits down in chair next to Spectral's desk* Hi.**

**Spectral: The first question we have for you is from HealerAriel. Her question is: **

"Do you think Bit and your little sister have a "thing"? If so, would you approve of it? If you wouldn't, how would you hide his body?"

**Leon: Of course they do, and I approve of that…but I would hide his body at the bottom of the ocean…*shifty glance***

**Spectral: Okaaaay…the next question is from…*looks at card*… Shiro Amayagi. He (assuming you're a guy) wants to know "Why do fan-girls stalk you if you really don't have any power as a pilot?"**

**Leon: Besides the fact that they can't get enough of me…I am a good pilot! The Blade Liger wouldn't let me pilot it if I wasn't.**

**Spectral: Very well. The next question is from *gasp* Fire Fox *pauses for dramatic music*. She wants to know how you keep your hair that way.**

**Leon: Believe it or not but it stays this way on its own.**

**Spectral: Shocking. The next question is from… Shadowfox-b4k4. He(assuming you're a guy) what's to know if Leena tormented you when you were growing up.**

**Leon: Of course she did. One time when I was in high school, she let all the girls from my math class in the bathroom just as I was getting out of the shower. **

**Audience: *cheers and disappointed sounds because they weren't there***

**Spectral: *glowing***

**Audience: *silent***

**Leon: And another time she rigged my door so it would explode when I opened it.  
****Spectral: Ouch…well the next question is from plink. She wants to know…"Is it true that you found Leena in a dumpster and felt sorry for her so you raised her?   
How in hell did you meet your wife, and did she leave you or did she die because one of your stupid 'investments' fell on her or something?"**

**Leon: What? Leena's my sister and I've never been married…**

**Audience: *cheers***

**Fan-Girlfromaudience: *jumps on stage and runs toward Leon* Marry me!**

BOOM  
  


            The dust clears and the robots scoop the dust off the stage. Spectral sets the laser cannon back down on his desk and turns to Leon.

**Spectral: That was close…well. That's it for the questions. We'll see ya next time Leon.**

**Leon: Okay. Bye.**

            A dimensional portal opens and Leon falls through it. Spectral turns to the disappointed audience.

**Spectral: Why so disappointed? Raven will be here after this commercial break.**

**Audience: *cheers and fan-girl squeals***

**Spectral: SILENCE!**

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

New from Spectral Inc.  
  


Tired of those annoying fan-girls? Do they hunt you day and night? Well We have a solution to your problem! The new fan-girl bait 3006 ½ ! Just program it with who you are and set it on its way! It will bash you to next Thursday. That should keep those fan-girls busy until you can escape!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Spectral: We're back. This next segment could contain some not nice things so reader discretion is advised. Here's Raven!**

            A portal opened up and Raven was dropped in a chair next to Spectral's desk. 

**Audience: *screams and cheers***

**Spectral: *Death Glare***

**Audience: *silent***

**Spectral: That's better. Hi Raven. We've got a ton of question for you so here's the first one. It's from… *looks at card*…HealerAriel. She wants to know "is all of your rage secretly caused by pent up sexual frustration? And if it is, can I help you ease that frustration? ^_~"**

**Raven: No.**

**Spectral: Is that all you're going to say?  
****Raven: Yes.**

**Spectral: Very well. The next question is from…Shiro Amayagi who wants to know why you let Hiltz blow up Shadow.**

**Raven: I didn't let him do anything. He caught me off guard. I'll kill him for that. And you too if you ask me that question again. And I'll get you too!*points at Spectral***

**Spectral: Go ahead and try. The next question is from …Fire Fox.**

**Raven: Not her…**

**Spectral: She wants to know what happened at the Zoid Eve. Well seeing as how Cartoon Network didn't show us the remaining episodes…go check out my ****Chaos Demon fic for the answer. The next question would be from… Prozen and Plink.**

Prozen wants you to pick up milk on the way home and Plink wants to know why you haven't killed Riece and Specular yet.

**Raven: I'll kill them after the show. And once I find Shadow…**

**Spectral: Chapter 5. The next question is also from Plink. She wants to know if you're related to Vega.**

**Raven: Who?**

**Spectral: That works. The next question is from… Mistress of All Worlds. She wants to know… "Why are you always so moody and trying to kill Van? Do you like Reese because a lot of fanfic writers pair you up with her? Are you single?" **

**Raven: I hate Van! He must die. I hate Riece too. And yes I am single but that's none of your business!**

**Spectral: That's the last question from them… I have a question though…**

**Raven: Then ask it.**

**Spectral: What would you do if an army of Fan-Girls was about to break down the door?**

**Raven: ? *turns around***

            Suddenly the lights go out. There's an evil cackling and the lights go back on. Hundreds of fan-girls led by Fire Fox are invading the studio. Raven jumps behind his chair and Spectral stands up.

**Spectral: ROBOTS! Stop them!**

            The robots rush forward and open fire but are pushed back by the fan-girls.

**Spectral: *glowing* Time to end this myself…STARBURST CANNON!**

            All he fan-girls except Fire Fox were blown from the studio. Raven jumped into a dimensional portal and Fire Fox followed.

**Spectral: Well…that could be a problem…oh well… next time on our show well have Shadow and Karl Shubatlz. See ya next time!**

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Next Time:

Shadow and Karl Shubaltz


	5. Karl Shubaltz and Shadow

**Spectral's Evil and Insane Zoids Themed Talk Show Type Show**

****

By, Spectral

Insanity comes in many forms this is one of the more pleasant ones…

**Disclaimer: Spectral doesn't own zoids or its characters. He owns this story and its plot but not Zoids or it characters. **

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Mr. Censor: Live from a studio somewhere in Limbo, it's Spectral's Zoid Themed Talk Show! Here's your host, Spectral!**

            Spectral appeared in a cloud of smoke. The audience applauded. Spectral tried to quiet them but they wouldn't stop. He tried again with no progress. The audience quickly became silent when Spectral pulled a flamethrower out of subspace.

**Spectral: Thank you, thank you. Well I've come up with some sort of talk show-like show. It will feature Zoids characters from all three series, some zoid battles, zombies, explosions, maniacal laughter, insanity, and some other zoid related stuff that I'll make up as we go along. That sound good?**

**Audience: Yes!**

**One guy in Audience: No!**

**Spectral: Dezlagrate…mory-tempe…et Intervalia!**

            The guys disappeared in a ball of flames and the audience was confused.

**Spectral: So I know a little Latin…**

            Spectral walked over to his desk and sat down. The control panel opened and several buttons and switched were revealed.

**Spectral: Yet another show for the anti-fan-girl robots to be on patrol. Our guests today are Shadow and Karl Shubaltz. **

**Audience: *cheers***

**Spectral: *holds up scythe***

**Audience: *silence***

**Spectral: Before I bring out one of them…I have some questions to answer.**

**Mr. Censor: Yep. Here's the first one. It's from No Stereotype. She wants to know when Van and Bit will be on the show. **

**Spectral: For Bit, check back CH7. For Van…well…we'll see…**

**Mr. Censor: Unknown made a comment about what you said about Zoids and Cartoon Network.**

**Spectral: Well I'd hate to tell you but Cartoon Network will probably never show what happens next. They made no error. They just start the series over from there. If you want to know what happens, e-mail me a request and I'll tell you. I have the Japanese episodes on DVD.**

**Mr. Censor: Schala85 wants to know if you'll accept guests.**

**Spectral: Sorry, but we're booked for guests. Maybe next season.**

**Mr. Censor: That's all.**

**Spectral: Then bring out our first guest…Karl Shubaltz!**

            A platform rises from the ground with Karl and a box on it.  Karl picked up the box and walked over to his chair. He sat down and put the box on Spectral's desk. 

**Spectral: Hello. What's in the box?**

**Karl: You'll see.**

**Spectral: Okay. The first question is from…HealerAriel. She says "You are so much cuter than your dorky brother, Thomas. You got the good genes, didn't you?" **

**Karl: Thank you for the compliment but please don't pick on my little brother.**

**Spectral: Yeah. Leave Thomas alone. You can bash him Ch8! Our next question is from oh no…Biowolf *Dramatic music*. She wants to know…"If one train left New York at 2:00 pm western heading west at 300mph and another train left San Francisco at 3:00 pm eastern heading east at 50mph then how long would it take Superman to spread peanut butter over the state of Texas with the help of 500 old women using butter knives?"**

**Karl: I'd say about an hour or so…**

**Spectral: Well I'd say never since I already coated the state of Texas with rabid dogs made of Kryptonite! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! *evil music and lightning* Okay. Our next question is from BecBet. She wants to know… "How can you live with Thomas? If he was my brother I'd be whacking him a tennis racket every five minutes."**

**Karl: Leave my brother alone. He isn't that annoying!**

**Spectral: Our next question is from Sick Little Fiend. She (assuming you're a girl) wants your hat.**

**Karl: *reaches into box and pulls out a pen* Okay. **

            Karl pulled one of his hats out of the box, autographed it and the turned to Spectral.

**Karl: How do I get it to her?**

**Spectral: ZOMBIES!**

            Several zombies rose from the ground and walked over to Spectral's desk.

**Spectral: *gives hat to zombie* Bring this hat to Sick Little Fiend!**

            The zombies turned and walked through a dimensional portal. 

**Spectral: The next question is from Schala85. She wants to know…" How'd he become so dang hot!? And would he go out with me? Please? And...what's the best part of firing the Gravity Cannon?"**

**Karl: Thanks for the compliment, sorry but no, and the Gravity Cannon is all around fun for the whole family.**

**Spectral: Ah ha…well the next question is from …*looks at card* Fire Fox. *pause for dramatic music* She wants to know what it's like to be the first person to fire the Gravity Cannon.**

**Karl: It's energizing to fire such a large and powerful weapon.**

**Spectral: The next question's from Dragon Valor. He wants to know "are you related to Bit? Do you like your brother? will you take my older brother for a day or more?? he's only 18!!**

**Karl: Who? , yes, and no.**

**Spectral: Simple enough…the next question's from plink. She (assuming you're a girl) wants to know…"How do you feel about the Japanese obsession of Karl x Thomas? Your own brother? Odd I know, but true...**

**Karl: I think I'll choose to NOT answer that one…**

**Spectral: Hiding something?**

**Karl: *red* NO!**

**Spectral: Well, we'll just have to ask Thomas when he's on the show. The next question is from…Mistress of All World. She wants to know…"Do you like your brother? Why did you join the army? What was the scariest moment in your life? Are you single?"**

**Karl: Yes, I joined the army because all Shubaltzes have joined the Imperial Army, The scariest moment of my life was when I was being controlled by that Riece woman…, and I won't answer that question…**

**Spectral: Ah ha…The next questions are from the Hog of Hedges. He (assuming that you are a guy) wants to know where you got your hat and what it was like making things go boom with the Gravity Cannon.**

**Karl: I got my hat from the Imperial Hat Maker in Guygalos and I already answered your second question.**

**Spectral: The last questions come from Shiro Amayagi. He wants to know…"how do you deal with Thomas all the time and do you love Fiona too?"**

**Karl: I have several bits of information that Thomas really doesn't want anyone to know. So that keeps him in line, and …no.**

**Spectral: Ah ha. Well that's all the questions….**

**Karl: Before I go I'd like to give the Audience some hats.**

**Spectral: Very well…*pushes button***

            The hat box disappeared and the hats magically reappeared on the heads of everyone in the audience. 

  
**Spectral: Go hang out back stage. We'll call you back a little later.**

**Karl: Okay.**

**Spectral: We'll be back after this commercial break.**

**Audience: *cheers***

**Spectral: *cracks knuckles***

**Audience: *silence***

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**E-307: This is a test of the emergency broadcast system…**

BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP

**E-307: This has been a test of the emergency broadcast system. If this had been a real emergency, you'd all be on fire. Thank you.**

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Spectral: And…we're back.**

**Mr. Censor: The next guest is here…**

**Spectral: Send him in then! Here's Shadow!**

            Shadow crashes through a window and sits in a chair next to Spectral's desk. The window reforms and the translator machine appears.

**Spectral: Hi Shadow!**

**Shadow: Hello.**

**Spectral: The first question is from HealerAriel. She says…"Shadow: You're so cute! But anyway, what's it like living with an evil, psychotic hottie like Raven? Does it hurt your feelings that he bosses you around all the time? Do you want to come live with me then, and be my special friend? I'm a lot nicer than Raven. He wouldn't even answer my question... *pouts*"**

**Shadow: Living with Raven is fun. There's always something new to destroy. He can boss me around all he wants but if he goes too far, I'll just release a certain set of photos to the public. **

**Spectral: *holds up photos* These pictures?**

**Shadow: How'd you get those?**

**Spectral: *shocked* I think that these would set the Raven Fan-Girls into out of control mode…**

**Shadow: Yes they would. Now to finish answer the question… thanks for the offer but I'll keep living with Raven.**

**Spectral: *still looking through the photos…there's 100's of them…* The next question is from…*looks at card*…Destiny. The Immortal Fate wishes to know…"Would you classify yourself as a sidekick? If so, what are your feelings on the issue?"**

**Shadow: I am no sidekick! The last person who called me a sidekick was melted by the Charged Particle Cannon. **

**Spectral: *freaked out* How'd you manage to get this one?**

**Shadow: I have cameras all over the place.**

**Spectral: Ah ha. Well the next question seems to be from…Fire Fox *pause for dramatic music* She wants to know what your secret passion is besides destruction.**

**Shadow: Well I do like to bake things. I'm quite good at it if I do say so myself.**

**Spectral: *scared by two things* You do know that if Raven finds out you have this particular picture then not even I will be able to save you.**

**Shadow: Yes. But Raven doesn't scare me.**

**Spectral: The next question is from Plink. She wants to know…"Does it bother you that your master is always ordering you around? Do you feel that Raven is yours, and therefore must be taken care of?"**

**Shadow: Raven is not my master. He is my Partner and Friend. Of course I have to take care of him.**

**Spectral: Hog of Hedges wants to know why you let Raven push you around and if you like the Geno Breaker.**

**Shadow: I answered that already, and no. It should be black but it's red. **

**Spectral: *copying the pictures* Shiro Amayagi wishes to know why you have wings and the other organoids don't.**

**Shadow: My wings make me look more Evil then I really am. That's why I have them.**

**Spectral: *faxing the pictures to Fire Fox* Okay…Raine Roa wants to know..." would you consider you and Raven partners and if you do why?"**

**Shadow: Yes and because we just are.**

**Spectral: *hands shadow the original pictures*Okay. Let's bring Karl back out so we can start a game!**

**Audience: *cheers***

**Spectral: *holds up a grenade***

**Audience: *silence***

            Two robots carry Karl out to the stage and drop him in a chair.

**Spectral: Answers the questions…get on wrong and pain awaits! Shadow, who is the most Dangerous Hiltz Fan-Girl?**

**Shadow: Biowolf**

**Spectral: Karl, what color is Thomas's uniform?**

**Karl: Green.**

**Spectral: Shadow, who is the Dark Kaiser?**

**Shadow: Prozen.**

**Spectral: Karl, what zoid does Brad Hunter pilot?**

**Karl: The Lightning Siax.**

**Spectral: Wrong! Away you go! *pushes button***

            Karl is catapulted through the ceiling and Spectral turns to Shadow.

**Spectral: Shadow, what happens when I push this button?**

**Shadow: I don't know…**

**Spectral: *pushes button* This!**

            A cage sprang up a few feet away.

**Spectral: What?! That was supposed to capture Shadow…what happened?!**

**Mr. Censor: The painters moved your desk and the chairs.**

**Spectral: Oh well…on the next show we'll have The Judge and Brad Hunter. See you then.**

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Next Time:

Brad and the Judge


	6. Brad Hunter and The Judge

**Spectral's Evil and Insane Zoids Themed Talk Show Type Show**

****

By, Spectral

Insanity comes in many forms this is one of the more pleasant ones…

**Disclaimer: Spectral doesn't own zoids or its characters. He owns this story and its plot but not Zoids or it characters. **

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Mr. Censor: Live from a studio somewhere in Limbo, it's Spectral's Zoid Themed Talk Show! Here's your host, Spectral!**

            Spectral appeared in a cloud of smoke. The audience applauded. Spectral tried to quiet them but they wouldn't stop. He tried again with no progress. The audience quickly became silent when Spectral pulled a flamethrower out of subspace.

**Spectral: Thank you, thank you. Well I've come up with some sort of talk show-like show. It will feature Zoids characters from all three series, some zoid battles, zombies, explosions, maniacal laughter, insanity, and some other zoid related stuff that I'll make up as we go along. That sound good?**

**Audience: Yes!**

**One guy in Audience: No!**

**Spectral: *snaps fingers***

            There was a puff of smoke and when it cleared, the guy from the audience was a chinchilla. Spectral walked over to his desk and sat down behind it. The control panel activated and the buttons appeared.

**Spectral: Before we begin the show, I believe there are some questions for me…**

**Mr. Censor: Sick Little Fiend wants to know when O'Connell will be on and she wants you to ship using UPS next time.**

**Spectral: O'Connell will be on the show, just wait for CH12 (I think…) and I did use UPS. I shipped the hat with the Undead Postal Service.**

**Mr. Censor: Schala85 said this, "just wanted to tell ya that I'm the authoress of Clashing Realities (since you weren't so sure in your profile ^_~), Biowolf's just kind enough to post it for me...although I haven't been in the humorous mood lately...please update this so I can get back to writing it? Please? *irresistible kitten eyes* (I made up the kitten eyes too! ^___^)"**

**Spectral: Sorry about that….I changed it almost immediately. (Lousy "effects may take up to 24 hours to appear" thing)**

**Mr. Censor: Okay… that's all.**

**Spectral: If that's all then its time to bring out the first guest…Here's the Judge!**

            The Judge appears in a chair next to Spectral's desk. 

**Spectral: Hello.**

**Judge: Area scanned, battlefield set up!**

**Spectral: HOLD IT! This isn't a zoid battle.**

**Judge: It isn't? Then why am I here?**

**Spectral: You have to answer some questions.**

**Judge: Then ask them.**

**Spectral: Okay, the first one is from…*looks at card* HealerAriel. She wants to know what it's like being a little plastic dude.**

**Judge: I'm not a "little plastic dude". I'm a robot that officiates zoid battles.**

**Spectral: The next question is from Fire Fox*pause for dramatic music*. She wants to know, "What do you do for fun when you are not getting blown up by the B.D. group?"**

**Judge: I wrestle. Didn't you see how I beat up that Dark Judge in the Shadow Fox episode?  
****Spectral: That was funny…the next question is from…Shiro Amayagi. He wants to know, "Why do all the judges look the same even if there are males and females?"**

**Judge: They just do.**

**Spectral: Ah ha… well Hog of Hedges wants to know, "Do you feel unloved? Do you think no one cares? If so, I know a good psychiatrist." And "Are you a guy or a girl? OR is there a difference?"**

**Judge: No, I do not feel unloved, plenty of people care, and I am a "guy". There are differences but I won't go into that right now…**

**Spectral: Very well…that was the last question. Go hang out back stage and we'll call you back out later. **

**Judge: Okay.**

**Spectral: We'll be back after this commercial break.**

**Audience: *cheers***

**Spectral: *picks up shovel***

**Audience: *silence***

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Demon Notebook: The following is a test of the Evil Alarm System Broadcast.**

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

**DN: If you hear that sound, RUN FOR YOUR LIFE! This has been a test if the EASB. If this had been a real alarm of approaching evil, you would be RUNNING FOR YOUR LIFE!**

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Spectral: We're baaaaaaaaaaaaa-aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack.**

**Audience: *cheers* **

**Spectral: *picks up flamethrower***

**Audience: *silence***

**Spectral: Time for our next guest. MINIONS! Go get Brad Hunter.**

            Two robots fly through a dimensional portal. They return a few moments later with Brad. They drop him in a chair next to Spectral's desk.

**Spectral: Hello.**

**Brad: Am I getting paid to be here?**

**Spectral: No.**

**Brad: Then why am I here?**

**Spectral: Because if you try to leave before the show ends I'll drop you into the fiery underworld.**

**Brad: Then ask your questions.**

**Spectral: Very well. The first question's from HealerAriel. She wants to know, "I love your hair, by the way, and I can totally relate to your coffee addiction, because I love coffee too! Are you seeing Naomi? If you are, would you like to go out for coffee with me, just as friends? If you're not seeing her, can we go out for coffee on a date? Pretty please? I'd even pay you! Oh, and does Bit walk in on Leena in the shower a lot? It's not really accidental, is it? ^_~ XOXO!"**

**Brad: Yes I am going out with Naomi but no one's supposed to know about that…but sure I'll go out with you. Just bring money. As for the Bit thing, Bit doesn't just walk in on Leena. He seems to do it to everyone but Doc. None of us think it's accidental anymore.**

**Spectral: Ever thought of locking the door?**

**Brad: Well, Jamie and I don't really care and no matter how many times we suggest it to Leena, she keeps forgetting to lock the door.**

**Spectral: Oh. Well, the next question's from…*looks at card* Fire Fox*pause for dramatic music* Who keeps doing that? Anyway…she asks, "How much conditioner do you use in a week? I bet he uses a lot of his prize money on hair care products. Just how much does he spend on hair care products?"**

**Brad: Not a lot…**

**Spectral: That's all you'll say?**

**Brad: yes.**

**Spectral: Joy. The next question is from…Shiro Amayagi. He wants to know what you'll do to him if he causes the Shadow Fox to self-destruct.**

**Brad: I'd break him in two if he did that.**

**Spectral: Interesting. The next question is from…Hog of Hedges. He wants to know, "Do you like the Shadow Fox or the Command Wolf better? And what do you think about Bit?"**

**Brad: Shadow Fox and Bit's an okay zoid pilot but he's incredibly annoying and weird.**

**Spectral: And you're normal? The next question id from…*looks at card that has mysteriously caught fire* Sick Little Fiend. She says "My best friend thinks you're ugly. How does that make you feel?"**

**Brad: Tell your best friend that I will hurt them.**

**Spectral: Bluemoon Wolf wants to know if you're going out with Naomi.**

**Brad: yes but no one's supposed to know that…**

**Spectral: Mistress of all Worlds asks "How much coffee do you drink each day? What do you like he most, money, coffee, or Naomi? If you had to choose to go out ton a date with either Leena or Mary Champ, who would you pick? How much money do you make?"**

**Brad: About three pots, Naomi, Mary Champ, and a lot of money.**

**Spectral: Okay…The last question is from Fuzzy. The Rabid Vegetarian wishes to know "Brad, if you could change one thing about your life, what would it be?"**

**Brad: I'd like to be a rich zoid warrior married to Naomi.**

**Spectral: Very nice, but that was more than one thing…**

**Brad: So what?**

**Spectral: Bring back out the Judge so we can start the game!**

            The Judge is carried on stage by a Zombie and dropped in a chair next to Brad.

**Spectral: Answer the questions correctly and you might win, get one wrong and pain awaits!**

**Audience: *cheers***

**Spectral: *holds up old dictionary***

**Audience: *silence***

**Spectral: Brad, what is the name of Riece's Organoid?**

**Brad: Specula.**

**Spectral: Judge, which battle mode is a standard battle without restrictions on arsenal or number of warriors?  
****Judge: Battle mode 0990.**

**Spectral: Brad, What zoid does Thomas Shubaltz pilot?**

**Brad: Iron Kong.**

**Spectral: Wrong! Dezlagrate more tempe et intervalia!**

            Brad disappeared in a ball of flames.

**Spectral: Judge, who is the Baron of Wings?**

**Judge: Prozen.**

**Spectral: Wrong! *presses button***

            The Judge simply disappears. There's an odd silence.

**Spectral: Okaaay. That's all for today's show. Next time we'll have Bit Cloud and Hiltz.**

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Next Time:

Bit Cloud and Hiltz


	7. Bit Cloud and Hiltz

**Spectral's Evil and Insane Zoids Themed Talk Show Type Show**

****

By, Spectral

Insanity comes in many forms this is one of the more pleasant ones…

**Disclaimer: Spectral doesn't own zoids or its characters. He owns this story and its plot but not Zoids or it characters. **

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Mr. Censor: Live from a studio somewhere in Limbo, it's Spectral's Zoid Themed Talk Show! Here's your host, Spectral!**

            Spectral appeared in a cloud of smoke. The audience applauded. Spectral tried to quiet them but they wouldn't stop. He tried again with no progress. The audience quickly became silent when Spectral pulled a flamethrower out of subspace.

**Spectral: Thank you, thank you. Well I've come up with some sort of talk show-like show. It will feature Zoids characters from all three series, some zoid battles, zombies, explosions, maniacal laughter, insanity, and some other zoid related stuff that I'll make up as we go along. That sound good?**

**Audience: Yes!**

**One guy in Audience: No!**

**Spectral: That's it! I've had just about enough of you! I DUMMON THE MIGHTY BLACK DRAGON!**

            The Dragon appeared and roared. It then opened its mouth and shot a stream of fire and acid at the guy in the audience. The guy then fell to a pile of dust. 

**Spectral: Thanks, Dragon!**

            The dragon roared and then stomped into the shadows. Shadow walked over to his desk and sat down. The buttons of doom appeared on his desk and he turned to the audience.

**Spectral: Well, before we begin…are there questions for me?**

**Mr. Censor: yes, the first one's from… Dragon Vaylor wants to know when Jamie will be on the show.**

**Spectral: Chapter 8. Next question please…**

**Mr. Censor: Plink wants to know…"if you ever track down Prozen, I'd like to ask permission to come on your show and abduct him. *evil grin*"**

**Spectral: I am tracking Prozen at this very moment. For some reason he seems to be avoiding this show… and you can come to try and take him away when he's on the show. You just have to get past the attack robots…**

**Mr. Censor: Shadow Vixen offers a new weapon…**

**Spectral: Okay. New weapons are always welcome!**

**Mr. Censor: That's all the questions…**

**Spectral: Okay then…our first guest is, *looks at card* Bit Cloud. **

**Audience: *cheers***

**Spectral: *picks up watermelon***

**Audience: *silence***

**Spectral: *throws watermelon into subspace* MINIONS! RETRIEVE BIT CLOUD!**

            Two zombies rose from the ground and walked through a dimensional portal. They returned with a very frightened Bit Cloud. They threw him into a chair next to Spectral's desk and then sank into the shadows.

**Spectral: Hi Bit!**

**Bit: Those were zombies…**

**Spectral: Yes now shut up. You're on this show to answer questions…**

**Bit: Okay, ask your questions then.**

**Spectral: Very well *cards suddenly appear in hand* The first question is from… HealerAriel. She wants to know…"Bit, you know what? You're cuuuuuuute!! Did you know that? And I think you and Leena are really cute together, by the way. And, um, will you go out with me? The same as with Brad, I'd pay you to, I just want to bask in the glory of your adorableness! Ciao, my cutie!"**

**Bit: Uhh…thanks…I think and you can come along to the next battle I'm in.**

**Spectral: Okay…the next question's from… *looks at card which has mysteriously caught fire* Serena. She wishes to know…"Bit will you go out with me? Liger is the coolest zoid. He is my favorite. I have a model of him in my room. You are my favorite pilot."**

**Bit: You can come to the next battle too.**

**Spectral: *randomly setting things on by touching them* *notices the camera* What? Oh….uhhh the next question is from…*looks at flaming card* Shadow Fox-b4k4, who wants to know…"at least how many times a week does Leena knock you out? The same goes for the times you steal her food. Also, how is it that you're so flexible that you can use your foot to eat with, like in the first episode?"**

**Bit: About 5 for the first two and it's really not that hard to eat with your feet. Have you ever tried?**

**Spectral: *throws burning card at Bit* I'll ask the questions on this show. The next one's from…Schala85. She says you're the "biggest, idiot, jerk, etc., etc. in Zoids Zero"**

**Bit: I'm not an idiot or a jerk…**

**Spectral: Whatever you say…Hog of Hedges asks…"What happens when you run out of luck in battle?"**

**Bit: I don't need luck to win my battles.**

**Spectral: And…"What would you do if you couldn't pilot the Liger Zero, say, if someone slightly evil, like say me, blew it up? Hypothetically speaking, of course. *Heheheh SUCKER!*"**

**Bit: Well, first I'd hurt you, and then I'd rebuild the liger.**

**Spectral: HOLD IT! No one is going to blow up the Liger Zero, got it Mr. "Slightly Evil"? If you blow it up, I can't steal it! And that's not a good thing for the person who blew up the zoid I was trying to steal.**

**Bit: What do you mean steal the Liger Zero?**

**Spectral: Uhh…nothing. The next question's from…*looks at flaming card* Dragon Vaylor. She wishes to know…"Why do you steal Leena's food? Will you date Leena? What Zoid would you rather have the Liger Zero or the Liger Zero X??"**

**Bit: The food doesn't have her name on it…, maybe…and what is a Liger Zero X?**

**Spectral: NEXT QUESTION! It's from…Fire Fox *pauses for dramatic music*. That's it! Where's that coming from?!**

**Mr. Censor: How should I know?**

**Spectral: Well find out!**

**Mr. Censor: Very well…**

**Spectral: Any way… Fire Fox*dramatic music*…wishes to know…"Why do you beat up little kids? I mean Vega was, what, like ten."**

**Bit: I don't beat up little kids. Vega was a skilled zoid warrior. He knew what he was getting into.**

**Spectral: Vega scares me…but anyway… the next question's from Shadow Vixen. She wants to know how you keep your hair like that.**

**Bit: This is just how my hair looks all the time..**

**Spectral: …moving on…Mistress of all Worlds has some questions. They are…" Who do you like? Would you rather go on a date with Mary Champ or Leena? Which do you like more, Leena or cookies?"**

**Bit: No comment, Leena, and Leena again.**

**Spectral: *sets desk on fire**looks up* Umm… the next question is from…the guy with the Masamune, I mean Shiro Amayagi. He wants to know…"Can you honestly claim that you're a good pilot? Is it not the Liger Zero that won all your battles? Sheesh, your ancestor, Van, was actually a good pilot. HIS power was what made the Blade Liger stronger, not vice versa..."**

**Bit: Of course I'm a good pilot! I won the Royal Cup didn't I? And the Liger wouldn't let me pilot it if I wasn't.**

**Spectral: *with new "not on fire" desk* The next question is from…Kristy. She wants to know…" if you had a choice would you date Jamie or leena? why are you an idiot?"**

**Bit: Hmm…Leena or Jamie…Jamie or Leena. I don't know.. it's too hard to choose. How about both? And…I AM NOT AN IDIOT!**

**Spectral: That was the last question…**

**Bit: I can leave then?**

**Spectral: Yes. ZOMBIES! Escort Mr. Cloud out of the building.**

**Bit: Zombies!?!?!**

            A wave of the undead picked up Bit and carried him out of the studio.

**Spectral: We'll be back after this commercial break.**

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1…0…MAKE THINGS GO BOOM NOW!  
*commercial explodes*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Spectral: We're back.**

**Audience: *cheers***

**Spectral: *holds up giant poisonous cobra***

**Audience: *silence***

**Spectral: That's better. Let's get the next guest out here.**

            A really scary looking yellow robot flies into the studio. It drops Hiltz in the chair next to Spectral's desk and then flies away.

**Spectral: Hello Hiltz…**

**Hiltz: Hello.**

**Spectral: The first question we have for you is from…HealerAriel. She wishes to know…" Hiltz, you're a bad, bad man. Why are you so nasty all the time? Would you like some of my Prozac? I've got plenty, and it'll put you in a better mood - it's a prescription antidepressant. Oh, and is your hair naturally like that, or do you spend millions of bucks on hair care products?"**

**Hiltz: Because I can be and I don't want any of your stupid "Prozac"! Oh…and my hair is naturally red like this.**

**Spectral: You're certainly a pleasant person. The next questions are from…*looks at card and evil smile forms* Biowolf! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!*lightning strikes and evil music plays***

**Hiltz: B-B-B-B-B-Biowolf…**

**Spectral: Seeing as how there are so many questions I'll just give Hiltz the card and he'll read off answers to you…**

**Hiltz: *takes card* No, No, Still No, They must all be destroyed, Ambient constantly annoys me…he even died my hair pink while I was asleep one time…,who? , No, I said no…, leave me alone you psycho!, and finally, I belong to no one!**

**Spectral: *not paying attention* You're finished? Good. The next question is from…*looks at card that has suddenly turned to water* Schala85. She says…"Biowolf's out to get you, bwahahahaha!!! She'll capture you in an object no bigger than a baseball, bwahahahahahahaha!!!!!"**

**Hiltz: She'll never catch me!**

**Spectral: Yes she will. The next question is from Hog of Hedges. "What is it like being incredibly evil?"**

**Hiltz: It's fun being evil, there's just so much to do! Plus you get the cool clothes, a really creepy laugh, and a really powerful weapon.**

**Spectral: Being evil is incredibly fun! You even get your own talk show! But moving on…also from H of H…" What is it like using the Death Stinger and killing stuff?"**

**Hiltz: Fun.**

**Spectral: That's it?**

**Hiltz: Yes.**

**Spectral: Then the next question is from…*looks at stone tablet* Fire Fox*pauses for dramatic music* … she wishes to know…"Why did you want to kill Raven? AND have you ever cried during a Disney movie?"**

**Hiltz: I want to kill everyone but Ambient, and NEVER! I have never cried during a Disney movie!**

**Spectral: *holds up pictures* Yes you have. Shadow isn't the only one with cameras all over the place. ZOMBIE! **

            A zombie rises from the ground and limps over.

**Spectral: Bring these pictures to Fire Fox*pauses for dramatic music*…**

            The zombie took the pictures and walked through a dimensional portal.

**Spectral: The next questions come from Mistress of all Worlds. They are…"Would you rather be dumped into a pit full of sharks then be locked in a room with Biowolf for an hour? Why are you somewhat psycho? Can I have the Death stinger? How many cities have you destroyed? Who would you rather go on a date with, Reese or Biowolf?"**

**Hiltz: I'll take the sharks, I just am, no!, 178, and neither. They both scare me.**

**Spectral: 178? That's it? Please, I've destroyed thousands of cities…anyway…next set of questions is from…*looks at leaf* Plink. She wants to know…"Did you find Riece annoying? What about Raven? Did his attitude bother you in the way he acted towards you?  
*tugs his jacket* What was it like piloting the DeathStinger?!  
Mmm...I have one last question, and I may not like the answer...do you mind fan girls? *close to swooning* fan girls like me?  
*looks around to see if Biowolf is looking, then whispers* There was one last question, but I don't want it answered. *one last hug*"**

**Hiltz: *creeped out* Yes, Yes, fun, and Fan girls are the bane of my existence! They must all be destroyed!**

**Spectral: Shiro Amayagi asks…"D'you love Reise? How about Raven? Prozen? Oh yeah, and tell Ambient to GET THE MILK, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!!! I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR THREE YEARS!!!"**

**Hiltz: No…no…no…and no…**

**Spectral: Ya know what… ROBOTS!**

            Two Z Series Spectral Assault Robots fly out of the shadows. Spectral hands them each a crate of milk.

**Spectral: Bring those to Shiro Amayagi!**

            The robots nodded then flew through a dimensional portal.

**Spectral: The next question is from…Pink Blade Liger. It wishes to know why you killed Raven.**

**Hiltz: But I didn't kill Raven…yet…**

**Spectral: The final question is…remember when you stopped me from stealing Ambient?**

**Hiltz: Yes…  
****Spectral: Then it's time for you to pay! To Biowolf's you go!*pushes button***

**Hiltz: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!**

            A Dimensional Portal that leads directly to Biowolf opens up and sucks Hiltz in.

**Audience: *cheers***

**Spectral: *cracks knuckles***

**Audience: *silence* **

**Spectral: Next time we'll have Jamie and Thomas on the show! See ya next time!**

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Next Time:

Jamie and Thomas


	8. Jamie Hermeros and Thomas Shubaltz

**Spectral's Evil and Insane Zoids Themed Talk Show Type Show**

****

By, Spectral

Insanity comes in many forms this is one of the more pleasant ones…

**Disclaimer: Spectral doesn't own zoids or its characters. He owns this story and its plot but not Zoids or it characters. **

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Mr. Censor: Live from a studio somewhere in Limbo, it's Spectral's Zoid Themed Talk Show! Here's your host, Spectral!**

            Spectral appeared in a cloud of smoke. The audience applauded. Spectral tried to quiet them but they wouldn't stop. He tried again with no progress. The audience quickly became silent when Spectral pulled a flamethrower out of subspace.

**Spectral: Thank you, thank you. Well I've come up with some sort of talk show-like show. It will feature Zoids characters from all three series, some zoid battles, zombies, explosions, maniacal laughter, insanity, and some other zoid related stuff that I'll make up as we go along. That sound good?**

**Audience: Yes!**

**One guy in Audience: No!**

**Spectral: *snaps fingers***

            The guy is sent to the Shadow Realm as Spectral walks over to his desk and sits down. The buttons of doom appear and Spectral picks up the cards.

**Spectral: As usual, we'll start off with questions for me.**

**Mr. Censor: The first one's from Schala85. She asks, "I don't think I've asked you this, but are you bring Stigma into this?"**

**Spectral: Yes…Stoller will be here…soon…next chapter to be exact…**

**Mr. Censor: Plink sends a new part for your flamethrower.**

**Spectral: Really?!?!*takes part and combines with flamethrower. Sets to amusing Death* This will be fun.**

**Mr. Censor: Thanks a lot, plink. Now he'll be burning things and shooting burning oil at people all day after the show…the next question is from…Shiro Amayagi. Here's what he says, "These are mainly gifts. I think your essence is Terror, so you can have the Amonblade. What? I need people to help me annihilate the Mary Sues...Lei has the Erimblade and I have the Masamune/Gadesblade (it's called both things)...and you'll need this power to unleash the sword itself. Ancient Text: Spiritual Force of Terror. That's all for the gifts..."**

**Spectral: *chops desk in half with Amonblade* Sure, I'll help with the annihilation, and thanks for the blade and ancient text!**

**Mr. Censor: Why me…the next questions are from Serena. She asks, "Spectral when will Van and Zeke be on the show? And can you interview Liger Zero?" Also…"Spectral please tell Hog of Hedges a.k.a. Mr. "Slightly Evil" that if he dares touch the Liger Zero or Bit I'll beat the living daylights outta him. Same for you Spectral. And why don't you threaten the audience with a gundam like Wing Zero or Deathscythe Hell Custom?"**

**Spectral: *with new "not chopped in half by a blade of terror" desk* Uh…let's see…*pulls out book* Van and Zeke are scheduled to be a on the show…as well as the Liger Zero…so the answer to your questions is yes. And…sure I'll tell H of H but…I've already hurt Bit and I will steal the Liger Zero so…*picks up AmonBlade* you can try to attack all you want. About the gundams…I don't like the wing zero and Duo won't let me borrow the DSH…**

**Mr. Censor: Amy asks, "Spectral, could you come to my school and blow up some of my annoying classmates? And when will Vega be on the show?"**

**Spectral: Hmmm….destruction…maybe. And Vega is booked to be on the show sometime later…I'm note quite sure when though…**

**Mr. Censor: That's all. **

**Spectral: Okay… let's bring out the first guest, Thomas Shubaltz!**

**Audience: *cheers***

**Spectral: *shoots them with burning oil***

**Audience: *silent and crispy***

**Spectral: MINIONS! Retrieve Thomas Shubaltz!**

            A hole opens in the ground and a giant flaming claw rises from it. The claw drops Thomas Shubaltz in a chair next to Spectral's desk and then retreats back into the fiery underworld. 

**Spectral: Hello Thomas.**

**Thomas: Hi. It's nice to be here.**

**Spectral: *raises eyebrow* Oh really? I'll be sure to change that. The first question is from…*looks at card*… Anonymos. Anonymos asks," Why are you an idiot? You don't have any skill as a zoid pilot either. Why?"**

**Thomas: I am not an idiot and I'm one of the best Zoid pilots around!**

**Spectral:… *looks at card*  Mistress of all Worlds asks, "Don't you see that Fiona does not like you? Can I have your Dibison? Why are you so cocky? Can I get date with your brother, Karl? Karl is so cute! ^_^ Can I lock you in a room with hungry lions?"**

**Thomas: I have no idea what you're talking about, no, I am NOT, why don't you ask him? And No, you can't lock me in a room with hungry lions.**

**Spectral: HealerAriel asks, "You DO realize that Fiona is truly, madly, deeply in love with Van, right? I mean, you don't really have much of a chance, and you're kind of a schmuck... Why don't you just give up on Fiona and find a girl who actually likes you that way? And also, did you know that you're the only Zoids guy besides Hiltz and your brother that I haven't asked out? Don't it depress you?"**

**Thomas: I have no idea what you're talking about. And yes…the fact that you didn't ask me out does depress me…*depressed***

**Spectral: People, please don't depress the guests. Moving on… Hog of Hedges asks, "Just what's so great about Fiona?" and, "How come you Dibison is the only one to use a Megalo-Max? Is it the whole AI unit thing?"**

**Thomas:  What isn't great about Fiona? She's the most beautiful girl on all of Zi! And, to answer the other question, I'm just the only one smart enough to use the Megalo-Max.**

**Audience: *cheers***

**Spectral: FIRE THE MEGALO-MAX!**

            A Dibison rises from the ground and fires the Megalo-Max at the audience.

**Audience: *silent and once again crispy***

**Spectral: The next questions are from Shadow Vixen. She asks, "Does Karl have any little dark secret that you hold over him? Anybody ever tell you our a major hottie? Do you have any other siblings besides Karl? What's life like with the "perfect sibling"? Did you really build the DiBision by yourself? Why are you so shy? And would you date me?"**

**Thomas: Yeah I have dark secret of Karl's. One time, I found him in the showers with those Republican officers Herman and O'Connell and they were having…**

**Spectral: Say another word and I may be forced to send you into the ****Lawyer Pit of Eternal Torment! Any other dark secrets?**

**Thomas: Yeah…another time I found him, Van, and that Irvine guy having…**

**Spectral: ****Lawyer Pit of Eternal Torment!…, any more dark secrets?**

**Thomas: Yes…another time, me and Karl had to share a bed when we went to visit our sister for a week and we had…**

**Spectral: ****Lawyer Pit of Eternal Torment!… now move along to Shadow Vixen's other questions before I get angry…**

**Thomas: *scared* Okay…no, no one has ever told me that, yes we have a younger sister, depressing, I didn't build the Dibison I just improved it, I am not shy, and sorry but no, thanks for asking anyway.**

**Spectral: The next set of questions is from…*looks at card* Schala85. She says, "Hiyas! Could you make a copy of Beek for me? I love it's cute, adorable voice! Don't listen to those people that say you're an idiot, Bit's the idiot. If you're brother is so cool, you have to have some of that...right?"**

**Thomas: Uhh, sure I'll send a copy of Beek to you…and I'm not sure…**

**Spectral:  The next questions are from…plink. Plink asks, "Like many other people out there, could I have a copy of Beke? I'm trying to make some new software of the DeathSaurer MKII and it's looking promising. I just wanna see if you've covered areas I haven't. The other question was: what is your most embarrassing moment, apart from the Cerberus episode? Anything particularly horrible you did to your older brother just to annoy him?  
Any chance you and Raven might hook up?"**

**Thomas: Another copy of Beek…sure I'll send it over…as for my most embarrassing moment besides the Cerberus episode, the time I was walking around with my uniform on backwards. When I was younger, I had one of my machines move Karl into a tree while he was sleeping. When he woke up he fell out of the tree. Hook up with Raven…CERTAINLY NOT! Raven's got Flyheight…**

**Spectral: Very well…. The next questions are from…*looks at stone tablet* FireFox *pauses for dramatic music* …she asks…"Have you ever hurt yourself with that pointy thing on your battle suit in front of your face?"**

**Thomas: Yes, three times so far.**

**Spectral: Haha! The next question is from Shiro Amayagi. He asks, "Fiona's mine, y'hear?! MINE!!! But anyways, what exactly can Beak do? Does he just access Burnout (Megalomax)? Oh yeah, and...will you join the Anti-Mary Sue Movement (AMSM)?"**

**Thomas: NO SHE ISN'T!!!!!!! *calms down because he notices the flamethrower pointed at him* Beek is like an artificial Organoid, and what is a Mary Sue?**

**Spectral: Rubber Duckie wants to know, "Does it annoy you how Van+Fiona fans bash you in most fics? Ever thought of hiring Spectral for some revenge?"**

**Thomas: It annoys me very much and no I haven't thought of that. Spectral, can I hire you to help me get revenge?**

**Spectral: No.**

**Thomas: But why?**

**Spectral: *holds up bazooka and points it at Thomas***

**Thomas: Oh…that's why…**

**Spectral: *throws bazooka into subspace* The last questions are from…*looks at card* Amy. She wants to know, "Why are you such an annoying dweeb? And why do have such a bad haircut?"**

**Thomas: I am not an "annoying dweeb"! And leave my hair alone… no matter what I do to it, it stays this way…**

**Spectral: Whatever. That was the last question, go hang out back stage we'll call you for a game later.**

**Thomas: Okay.**

**Spectral: We'll be back after this commercial break.**

**Audience: *cheers***

**Spectral: *EvilDeathGlare***

**Audience: *scared and silent***

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Spectral: Are you constantly plagued by fan girls/fan boys? Will they just not leave you alone? Are you afraid to leave your own home? Well if that's you then I have a solution to your problem.**

SPECTRAL'S NEW AND IMPROVED ANTI-INSANE FAN GIRL/FAN BOY SPRAY!

**Spectral: That's right. This spray is comprised has been proven to eliminate insane fan-girls/boys with just one spray! And even better, this one doesn't have any side-effects! (We hope). So, if you have an Insane Fan-Girl/Fan-Boy problem, buy…**

SPECTRAL'S NEW AND IMPROVED ANTI-INSANE FAN GIRL/FAN BOY SPRAY!

  
**Spectral: What the scary announcer person said…**

Warning, SPECTRAL'S NEW AND IMPROVED ANTI-INSANE FAN GIRL/FAN BOY SPRAY!, does not work on authors/authoresses (**THAT MEANS YOU CAN'T USE IT ON BIOWOLF, HILTZ! OR FIREFOX, RAVEN!)**

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Spectral: And we're back!**

**Audience: *cheers***

**Spectral: *sets flamethrower to 'amusing death'***

**Audience: *silent but not extra crispy***

**Spectral: Let's bring out the next guest! It's Jamie Hermeros!**

            A scary looking yellow robot flies in and drops Jamie in a chair next to Spectral's desk.

**Spectral: Hi Jamie!**

**Jamie: Hi…why am I here?**

**Spectral: To answer questions. Here's one now. It's from…*looks at card*…Mistress of All Worlds. She asks, "What would happen if I painted your Zoid pink? Do you like Pierce? How old are you? What do you think of fangirls? Can I have your Zoid?"**

**Jamie: If you painted my zoid pink, it would become pink and I would have to repaint it green again. Pierce is okay…I choose to not answer that question, fan-girls scare me…, and no you can't have my zoid.**

**Spectral: Healer Ariel asks, "Does it get frustrating to be the only sane one on the Blitz team? What do you like in a girl? Do you find me attractive? And, uh, since we're the same age and all, will you go out with me? I'm working on going on a date with every guy on the Blitz team, and Brad and Bit have already caved, so... Oooh, and tell Brad I had a lovely time with him, will you? Bit could use some training, however..."**

**Jamie: Yes it does…*trails off into inaudible mumbling***

**Spectral: *evil grin* He said of course he'll go out with you, Healer Ariel.**

**Jamie: !!!!!!!!!**

**Spectral: Hog of Hedges asks," Why do you like the Pteras more?" Also, "Do you have ANY recollection of ANYTHING that happens when the Wild Eagle takes over?"**

**Jamie: The Pteras was the zoid that I had since I was a little kid, and I only remember very little…**

**Spectral: *presses random button and there's an explosion and screaming heard in the background* What?*shifty glance* The next question is from…Kristy. She asks," Jamie you need a girlfriend? why not pierce?"**

**Jamie: …**

**Spectral: No answer? Then I'll just fill up this empty time… yeah evil people do rock. And why can't pink blade liger become evil? What's wrong with an evil pink blade liger? Oh yeah…evil and pink don't mix…moving on… the next questions are from…*looks at card that has caught fire* …Shadow Vixen. She asks," What's it like having a slightly psychotic side?," and, "And, you got a thing for Pierce don't you? Mwhahahaha. ADMIT IT!"  
****Jamie: Freaky and…*barely able to be heard* yes…**

**Spectral: HA! I knew it! The next question is from…Dragon Vaylor. She asks," Why do you wear pink boots 24/7? WILL YOU PLEASE GO OUT WITH ME!!! PLEASE I BEG OF YOU"**

**Jamie: But I don't wear pink boots 24/7….I'm wearing blue sneakers right now…and sure just calm down…**

**Spectral: The next question is from…*looks at card* Schala85. She wants to know if you want your Pteres back.**

**Jamie: *eyes turn to stars* YES! IS SHE GOING TO GIVE ME MY PTERES BACK?!?!?!?!?!?!**

**Spectral: Only if you're good.**

**Jamie: *calms down* Okay.**

**Spectral: The next question comes from plink. She asks, "WHY?"**

**Jamie: Why what?**

**Spectral: Good question…Plink, can you explain what you meant by "WHY?"**

**Jamie: why what…**

**Spectral: NEXT QUESTION! It's from Fire Fox*dramatic music*…when I find out who is playing that music I'll make them pay…anyway….Fire Fox wants to know what your secret hobby is.**

**Jamie: I like to try and be evil…just every time I try to something bad happens to me…like the last time I was laughing evilly some giant rock almost crushed me. The message on the side of the rock said…"EVIL ROCKS! Bad pun intended From, The Evil Cliff" It was frightening…**

**Spectral:…Shiro Amayagi asks, "Why does everyone listen to the Wild Eagle, but not you? If you go insane again (yes, I've read Biowolf's "Fun with Phones" before…) would you like to go on a Mary Sue killing spree?"**

**Jamie: I don't know…and sure but what's a Mary Sue?**

**Spectral: The next question appears to be from…Rubber Duckie. She asks," Can you teach me how to cook? I'm a girl that can burn ice cream if you give me a chance and I need to make a birthday cake for a friend (If you say no then I'm sending you her hospital bill)"**

**Jamie: Uhhh…I'll see…also…I have released several cook books. They might help.**

**Spectral: The next question is from Amy. She asks," Why do you do everything for the Blitz Team? You act like their slave."**

**Jamie: If I don't do things, they won't get done. Besides, Bit, Leena, and Brad are my friends.**

**Spectral: How nice… that's all the questions….and since I'm bored we're just gonna play "drop Thomas into the ****Lawyer Pit of Eternal Torment! and teleport Jamie away". *presses button***

            There's a surprised yell as Thomas is dropped into the **Lawyer Pit of Eternal Torment! Jamie is suddenly teleported away. **

**Spectral: Okay… that's all for today's show. Next time we'll have Stigma Stoller and Günter Prozen on the show. See ya next time, I'm off to try and take over the world! *disappears in a cloud of smoke***

===============================================================

Next Time:

Stigma Stoller and Günter Prozen 


	9. Stigma Stoller and Gunther Prozen

**Spectral's Evil and Insane Zoids Themed Talk Show Type Show**

****

By, Spectral

Insanity comes in many forms this is one of the more pleasant ones…

**Disclaimer**: Spectral doesn't own zoids or its characters. He owns this story and its plot but not Zoids or it characters. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Mr. Censor**: Live from a studio somewhere in Limbo, it's Spectral's Zoid Themed Talk Show! Here's your host, Spectral!

            Spectral appeared in a cloud of smoke. The audience applauded. Spectral tried to quiet them but they wouldn't stop. He tried again with no progress. The audience quickly became silent when Spectral pulled a flamethrower out of subspace.

**Spectral**: Thank you, thank you. Well I've come up with some sort of talk show-like show. It will feature Zoids characters from all three series, some zoid battles, zombies, explosions, maniacal laughter, insanity, and some other zoid related stuff that I'll make up as we go along. That sound good?

**Audience**: Yes!

**One guy in Audience**: No!

**Spectral**: SHADOW WAVE!

            Spectral pointed at the guy and a wave of darkness was fired. It swept the guy out of the studio as Spectral went to his desk and sat down in his comically oversized chair. The buttons of doom rose from the desk.

**Spectral**: Well, today we have both Günter Prozen and Stigma Stoller. But before we begin…I'd like to apologize to anyone who was offended by the last chapter. I lost a bet and had to write Thomas the way I did. So don't blame me, blame the Demon Notebook…

**Mr. Censor**: We have some questions for you…

**Spectral**: Then ask them…

**Mr. Censor**: Maelgwyn sent you a charged particle gun wielding pink blade liger.

**Spectral**: Pink? I'll have to change the color, but thanks for the powerful zoid.

**Mr. Censor**: Shadow Vixen will give you an atomic bomb plant if you give her Thomas and Beek or just Karl.

**Spectral**: She can have tech boy and his little AI buddy. *snaps fingers*

            Two very large and scary robots fly from the shadows carrying Thomas and his Dibision. They then fly through a dimensional portal.

**Mr. Censor**: Oi… Spectral with nuclear weapons…not a good combination… anyway…the next question comes from…FireFox*pause for dramatic music*…she asks," What is this suppose to mean? Raven's got Flyheight… hmmm.....? Well, Spectral?"

**Spectral**: Uhh…. Please consult above apology…and these pictures *sends pictures to FireFox via UPS*

**Mr. Censor**: Plink*pause for dramatic music* says all this…" Thank you Spectral! Thank you so much! *Scrounges around for something interesting to give in return* Look, here are the keys to the Zoid facility back at base. Don't tell Skeyeta-sama I gave them to you. You can ask Ambient to make the Zoid for you. I'll rework the system when I get back so she doesn't know. *hugs Prozen tightly again* Nyuuu~~ *Tries to drag him away* Please?  
  
And, um, would you like to make a quick cameo in Angels?"

**Spectral**: Okay… you're welcome, thanks for the keys, I'll drop Prozen off there when I stop by…I'll have Ambient make me an EVIL Shadow Fox…then I'll steal him…and sure I'll do a cameo, I'll do other stuff too if you want.

**Mr. Censor**: More danger… Jamie sends a plea for help.

**Spectral**: Very well, but only because I need him (Wild Eagle really…) for chapter 11. ZOMBIES!

            Several zombies rise from the ground.

**Spectral**: Go retrieve Jamie, don't eat him, and don't harm Dragon Vaylor either…

            The zombies nod and then shuffle through a dimensional portal.

**Mr. Censor**: Amy asks." got some kids to believe that you're really coming to destroy them. So please come. And, did you blow up the heater in my classroom?"

**Spectral**: maybe…and no I didn't blow it up…

**Mr. Censor**: EVIL wants to borrow your flamethrower…

**Spectral**: NEVER!

**Mr. Censor**: That's all.

**Spectral**: Okay. Then let's bring out our first guest. MINIONS! Retrieve Stigma Stoller.

            A large bubble containing Stigma Stoller floats down and pops. Stoller lands in a chair next to Spectral's desk.

**Spectral**: Hi Stoller!

**Stoller**: Hello.

**Spectral**: The first question is from…wait a second…who stole the cards?

**Mr. Censor**: That thing over there…*points to the right*

            A strange mouse-like creature is trying to sneak out of the studio with the cards.

**Spectral**: Why you little…GET BACK HERE!

**Mouse Thing**: EEP!

            Spectral picks up his flamethrower, sets it to amusing death and charges after the mouse creature as it runs out of the studio.

**Mr. Censor**: Maybe I should have told him that I have another copy of the cards…oh well...  
**Alarm**: MISSLE LAUNCH IN 15 SECONDS! EVACUATE! EVACUATE!

**Everyone**: Uh-oh…

  
BOOM  
  


+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

**Computer**:  Please stand by. We are having technical difficulties. 

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

*20 Minutes Later*

**Spectral**: And we're back…sorry about the explosion…the studio is back in one piece and that strange mouse-like creature is currently running around the parking lot on fire. 

**Stoller**: What was that thing?

**Spectral**: Don't know, but it burns well. Any way… the first question is from…*looks at card* Maelgwyn. She asks, "You are a sexy beast; what is it like to use the Elephander, and kick Bit's arse?"

**Stoller**: Kinda like beating up a clown…

**Spectral**: Okay…the next question is from…Shadow Vixen. She asks, "What's with the glasses?"

**Stoller**: What glasses?

**Spectral**: She also wants to know if she can date Sanders. 

**Stoller**: Sure, I'm sure he wouldn't mind.

**Spectral**: The next question is from…Fire Fox*pause for dramatic music*…I will harm whoever is doing that…anyway…she asks," What do you do in your spare time when you are on vacation from the BDG?"

**Stoller**: I build zoids.

**Spectral**: Schala85 *pause for dramatic music*…YOU WILL PAY, MUSIC PERSON! YOU! WILL! PAY!...anyway…Schala85 asks," Hi!!!!!! Did you know I have the only romance fic out on FF.net for you? I'm *sniffle* the only one...*happy face* Hmmm...If you could, what other zoid(s) besides your elephandor would you pilot?"

**Stoller**: Yes I knew that and I'd want to pilot the Liger Zero Panzer.

**Spectral**: Cool. Next question's from…*looks at now flaming card* Hog of Hedges. He asks, "What is it like being out of the Backdraft?" and, "What is it like getting taken down twice by the same punk kid?"

**Stoller**: Starting over… and incredibly annoying!

**Spectral**: …Dragon Vaylor asks," I like the Elephander!! can I have it....^_^ please if not I'm gonna steal it..."

**Stoller**: No you cannot have the Elephander and you won't steal it!

**Spectral**: That's right. I'm going to steal it first.

**Stoller**: What?

**Spectral**: Moving on, the next question is from HealerAriel. She asks,"Whazzup?"

**Stoller**: Nothing really…

**Spectral**: Amy says," The Elephander is so cool. You were smart to quit the Backdraft. They don't deserve a zoid like that."

**Stoller**: Uhh…thanks I think…

**Spectral**: EVIL wants to know if you are evil.

**Stoller**: No I'm not evil…

**Spectral**: But I am!… well that's all the questions we have for you…

**Stoller**: Really?

**Spectral**: Yes…so…to make up for the last chapter, I'm sending you to Schala85. Bye. *presses button*

            Stoller falls through a dimensional portal.

**Spectral**: We'll be back after these messages.

**Audience**: *cheers*

**Spectral**: *finger hovers above big fuchsia button of doom*

**Audience**: *silent and wondering "Why Fuchsia?"*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**E-307**: Looking for some more funny stories? Well here are some other authors/authoresses that are very good at writing funny fics:  
  


**BecBet**

**Plink**

**Shiro Amayagi**

**Biowolf**

**Schala85**

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Spectral**: We're back! Let's bring out our next guest…Günter Prozen!

**Audience**: *cheers*

**Spectral**: *eyes glow*

**Audience**: *silent*

**Spectral**: MINIONS! Retrieve Günter Prozen!

            A giant dragon appears and drops a slightly annoyed Prozen in a chair next to Spectral's desk.

**Prozen**: Who are you and what is going on?

**Spectral**: I've been waiting for someone to ask that…*jumps up on desk and lights go out*

            A spotlight clicks on. It then is placed on Spectral who has his backed turned to everyone. (A/N: You all know what's gonna happen…I just had to do it…)

**Spectral**:*turns to left* Prepare for Trouble!

**Spectral**:*turns to right* And make it double!

**Spectral**:*turns to left* To inflict the world with devastation!

**Spectral**:*turns to right* To annoy all peoples in every nation!

**Spectral**:*turns to left* To denounce the evils of good and love!

**Spectral**:*turns to right* To extend my evil to the stars above!

**Spectral**:*turns to left* I am…

**Spectral**:*turns right* Spectral!

**Spectral**:*turns to left* The master of evil, tormenting the world all day and night!

**Spectral**:*turns to right* Surrender now or be ready to fight!

**Spectral**:*faces forward* That's right!

            The lights click back on and Spectral jumps back to his chair. Prozen seems slightly freaked out.

**Spectral**: Does that answer your question?

**Prozen**: Yes…

**Spectral**: Good, now answer these. The first one is from…*looks at card*Maelgwyn. She asks, "How did the deathsaurer core get into you? Isn't that kinda freaky?"

**Prozen**: When the Death Saurer exploded, I got fused with the core. And no, it isn't "freaky".

**Spectral**: Shadow Vixen asks, "Why the hell do you wear a freakin dress in Chaotic Century?, What's with the holes in your ears?, and I WILL hunt you...And I assure you that you will die..slllloooowwlllyyy....paiiiinnnnnfullllly...."

**Prozen**: I do not wear a dress! The holes are for earrings…and you can try to hunt me all you want, you'll never catch me! NEVER!

**Spectral**: Firefox*pause for dramatic music* asks," Did you get made fun of for your name when you were small? and What is your favorite thing to do at fast food restaurants?"

**Prozen**: Yes, but then I had the people that were making fun of me destroyed. And I do not like to even look at a fast food restaurant. Why would I be at one?

**Spectral**:…………………………………*notices camera and quickly picks up cards* Uhh… the next question is from…*looks at card* Schala85 *pause for dramatic music*…she asks," Would you like some Smokies? *evil cackle*"

**Prozen**: What on Zi is a "Smokie?"

**Spectral: You should know…anyway…the next questions are from Mistress of All Worlds. She asks," Prozen, why did you have to go psycho at the end of Zoids? And what was with that big, rock thing around you? And tell, did you ever go out with that stupid pink-haired girl with a weird haircut? I hope not! But I'm not finished yet! ^_^ Would you go out with me? Did you know, when you're not completely psycho, you're awesome? Have you ever had crazy fangirls chase after you? Where do you go o the hairdresser because I luv your hair! ^_^"**

**Prozen: Why not go psycho, that was the Death Saurer's zoid core, yes Lt. Harden and I went out, I'll think about it, yes, numerous times, and I go to the Imperial Hairdresser inside the Imperial castle.**

**Spectral: How interesting… next question is from *looks at card* Random. This person asks," Why do u have the hots 4 Hiltz?" **

**Prozen: I don't… **

**Spectral:  Thought so… next question's from…*looks at flaming card* plink*pause for dramatic music*. She asks, "Whoa, what to ask? You're my favorite character! *whines softly* Okay, okay, are you mad at me for not writing fiction of you for quite a while? What do you think of Zi's Angels so far, and do you have anything you'd like me to put in? Are you mad at me because I asked Spectral to put you in the show? *Gives him another hug* You smell nice ^^ Umm...Was there anything between you and Lt. Hardin (pink haired chick who was a bit strange) and what about Hiltz? *eyes widen* Am I in trouble for writing...*gulp* fics about you and...him? *laughs nervously* Can I take the DeathSaurer out for a spin? I want to see how it handles against the MKII version ^^ *cries* That's all I can think of! *sniffle* What do you wear under that suit? *pokes* Eh-he, sorry ^^"**

**Prozen: …not really, It's good and no, yes! After what Hiltz said about this show I'm concerned for my safety!, yes with Lt. Hardin and no with Hiltz, certainly, no it got destroyed remember, and I wear another suit identical to this one underneath the one I'm wearing now.**

**Spectral: That took longer than expected…trimogrow asks, "What's a Prozac? Did you invent them? How old are you? Why don't you have wrinkles? Why do you hat Republic?   
Can't you do something about Hardin's hair?..."**

***two hours later***

"Why do you always carry a pistol? Why are you holding the pistol right now?"

**Prozen: Do you seriously expect me to answer that?**

**Spectral: No…MINIONS!**

            Several giant robots fly out of the shadows.

**Spectral: Go destroy trimogrow. And hurry up with it!**

            The robots nod and then fly through a dimensional portal.

**Spectral: That should teach people not to ask so many STUPID questions! The next question is from…*looks at cards* Hog of Hedges. He asks, "What is it like getting taken down twice by the same punk kid?" and, "Why don't you do something constructive w/ your evil?"**

**Prozen: Very annoying and how am I supposed to be more constructive with my evil?**

**Spectral: Well I don't know about constructive but I can help with destructive. Just read my new book "Spectral's Evil, Doom, Chaos, and other assorted badness-ness-nesses"!*hands copy of book to Prozen* It'll be in stores soon… (I'll post it in fic form soon, too)**

**Prozen: *takes book* okay…**

**Spectral: HealerAriel asks, "What the hell is up with that bow-y thing on your hair? Are you an albino? Why are you psycho? Why can't you be a little more creative when you name people? If Raven had had blue hair, would you have named him Jay? If he'd had orange hair, would you have named him Oriole? Just wondering, O uncreative one..."**

**Prozen**: It keeps my hair the way it is, WHO TOLD YOU!?!?!, maybe…, and why should I be creative…besides, I didn't just name him Raven because of his hair, I predicted that he would bring great death and suffering to the world and the Raven, the bird of death, seemed like a good name.

**Spectral**: Ah-ha… the next questions are from…*looks at card* space pirate. She asks, "....ummmm...why do you wear high heels? and...I saw you wearing a bathrobe in one of the Zoids episodes. heh heh. why wear anything at all once you get out of the shower? *laughs*" 

**Prozen**: Why not and I was going to get into the shower not out of it…

**Spectral**: Anyway…SailorDigimon asks, "Well if it is, what was it like being in a giant goop of gross stuffs a.k.a. the Death Saurer's core? An' why do you look like Sephiroth?!?! YOU CAN'T~!!! SEPHIROTH IS MINE!!!! NYAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

**Prozen**: Its like sitting in gelatin and who or what is Sephiroth (I know but Prozen doesn't…why would he?)

**Spectral**: Pink Blade Liger wants to know if you are going to kill her.

**Prozen**: Maybe.

**Spectral**: I'll put a stop to that…the next question is from Serena. She asks," Prozen why are you such a freaking psycho?!. Whatever the reason me and my friend are gonna trap you in a DISNEY MOVIE OF OUR CHOICE!!!!! MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" 

**Prozen**: She scares me…

**Spectral**: Me too…Amy asks, "Why are you such an evil maniac? I think the Death Saurer is cool though."

**Prozen**: Why shouldn't I be such an evil maniac? And I think the Death Saurer is cool too!

**Spectral**: Okay…that's all. I'm going to go get Ambient to make a zoid for me now and then I'll steal him… and Prozen, you have to come too.

**Prozen**: But wh…*is thrown in bag*

**Spectral**: That's all! Next Time we'll have Liger Zero and Specula! *disappears in a cloud of smoke*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Next Time:

Liger Zero and Specula


	10. Specula and Liger Zero

**Spectral's Evil and Insane Zoids Themed Talk Show Type Show**

****

By, Spectral

Insanity comes in many forms this is one of the more pleasant ones…

**Disclaimer**: Spectral doesn't own zoids or its characters. He owns this story and its plot but not Zoids or it characters. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Mr. Censor**: Live from a studio somewhere in Limbo, it's Spectral's Zoid Themed Talk Show! Here's your host, Spectral!

            Spectral appeared in a cloud of smoke. The audience applauded. Spectral tried to quiet them but they wouldn't stop. He tried again with no progress. The audience quickly became silent when Spectral pulled a flamethrower out of subspace.

**Spectral**: Thank you, thank you. Well I've come up with some sort of talk show-like show. It will feature Zoids characters from all three series, some zoid battles, zombies, explosions, maniacal laughter, insanity, and some other zoid related stuff that I'll make up as we go along. That sound good?

**Audience**: Yes!

**One guy in Audience**: No!

**Spectral**: *staff suddenly appears in hand* Chaos Destroyer!

            A giant blast of blue light is fired from the gem on top of the staff. The guy in the audience is blasted to oblivion by the beam. Spectral throws the staff into sub-space and then walks over to his desk. The second he sits down in his comically oversized chair, the buttons of doom appear.

**Spectral**: Well, as always we'll start with questions for me.

**Mr. Censor**: Very well. The first question is from Dragon Vaylor. She says, "**standing on a huge dragon** Y DID U STEAL MY JAMIE!!!! o wait u said wild eagle right??? **happy dance** here are some gifts just because...ur bring in the wild eagle here are some rabid rubber duckies and this really hug gun I found in my attic and o ya a hallmark card"

**Spectral**: I did say Wild Eagle. In fact he's in the next chapter. Then you can have Jamie back. Thanks for the artillery, the rabid rubber ducks, and the card. As for having Maniac deliver these things…*looks over at smoking hole in the wall where the truck crashed through* … she doesn't have a license does she?

**Mr. Censor**: The next question is from Schala85*pauses for dramatic music*. She asks, "Ugh...I've got writer's block on my zoids fics...the horror...Nnnoooooo!!! Any methods to get rid of the cursed writer's block that does NOT impair bodily harm? By the way, I thought I saw Bit messing in your sound room. Perhaps he's the one that's been playing the dramatic music? And I have one last gift before I go: a flamethrower with two adjustable valves (whatever the fire comes out of) so you can flame two people at once. ^^"

**Spectral**: Well…without bodily harm…well I know a way that wouldn't cause you any bodily harm. Try thinking evil thoughts. It helps sometimes. Yes I know Bit was in the sound room but we found out he wasn't doing anything to the sound. He was hiding from a bunch of Raven and Vega Fan girls that wanted to harm him. Oh and thanks for the new flamethrower part! *combines with flamethrower and sets one side to 'amusing death' and the other to 'burning oil'* This should be fun. And Before I move to the next question…**WARNING!** You know what the **WARNING** is for Schala, you are the one who asked for the **WARNING**.

**Mr. Censor**: Fire Fox *pause for dramatic music* says, ". But have you ever noticed that Bit looks more like Thomas than Van?.....Or is it just me?" And She sends five dollars… 

**Spectral**: Bit kinda looks like a combination of Thomas and Van…*shudders at bad image* Bad image…anyway…thanks for the five dollars but I wasn't going to do anything to you in the first place…

**Mr. Censor**: plink*pauses for dramatic music* sends a ," little basket of extra yummy delicious chokkies"

**Spectral**: Thanks but what in the name of chaotic destruction is a "chokkie"?

**Mr. Censor**: Shadow Vixen says, "Anyway, can you please ask Stoller to forgive me? I thought he was that freak Major. Polta.  
Also, when will Lt. O'Connell or Col. Rob Herman be on?"

**Spectral**: Sure and I'll have to look into that…

**Mr. Censor**: Shiro Amayagi sends you plastic explosives…

**Spectral**: Thank you. Now my evil destructive power multiplies by tenfold! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! *lightning strikes and evil music plays*

**Mr. Censor**: WHAT IN THE WORLD WERE YOU THINKING?!?! Increasing his destructive power is a BAD THING… the next question is from Vanna Flyheight. She asks, "anyway, um, are you gonna have Van on anytime soon?"

**Spectral**: He's in the next chapter.

**Mr. Censor**: Lady Anime asks, "Also, why haven't you had Leena on the show yet?"

**Spectral**: Chapter 12. That's when Leena is booked for the show.

**Mr. Censor**: Razor says, 'I just want to inform you that when you hacked Thunder Blade's binary code. (See chp. 2 elementle time flip) Tha6t you put Recoil in overdrive, and she's heading your way even as I speak, by the time you get this review she'll have probly already planted the Nitro bomb somewhere in your studio and it should go off in about three seconds."

**Spectral**: nitro bomb…hmmm…you mean this?*picks up nitro bomb* I've already found it and it didn't explode. You can't beat me with explosives…they're my specialty.

**Mr. Censor**: Joy…timogrow sends a gift to make up for all the questions from before.

**Spectral**: new weapon!...and I wonder what happened to those robots.

            A dimensional portal opened and the robots stepped out of it.

**Spectral**: Got lost didn't you?

            The robots nodded disappointedly.

**Spectral**: it's okay. Go guard the perimeter of the studio…

            The robots nod again and fly into the shadows.

**Mr. Censor**: Froz Flame asks, "Spectral did u know your know is almost the same as Specula's?"

**Spectral**:  The only similarity I see is the 'Spec'…

**Mr. Censor**: That's all…

**Spectral**: Very well…then let's bring out our first guest!

**Audience**: *cheers*

**Spectral**: *holds up bazooka*

**Audience**: *silent*

**Spectral**: Bring out Specula!

            The blue organoid appears in a small explosion and sits down in the chair next to Spectral's desk. The translator then appears. 

**Spectral**: Hi Specula!

**Specula**: Hello.

**Spectral**: Okay, time for questions…the first one is from…*looks at card* Maelgwyn. She asks," What is Reese Like? Is she a babe without the extraneous clothes? Can I have you too? You are cool, but not as cool as Ambient."

**Specula**: Reese is okay but a little creepy sometimes…, I have no opinion on that…, and no. Yes I am cool but…CURSE THAT AMBIENT!

**Spectral**: …okay now…next question. It's from HealerAriel. She asks," Is Reese nice to you? Why do you only hiss, are you a defective model of organoid? Are you a boy or a girl? How can you tell if an organoid is male or female? What gender is Ambient? How 'bout Shadow? Wouldn't it kick ass if Zeke were really a girl organoid, after Van's been calling Zeke a "him" for so long? Do you have a crush on any of the other organoids, assuming that you're not all the same gender? Reese dyes her hair, doesn't she? That poser...  
Oh, and how do organoids have little baby organoids?"

**Specula**: Yes, I don't just hiss I just make sounds at a different frequency so you pathetic humans can't hear all of the sounds. NO I AM NOT DEFECTIVE! I'm a Girl, I won't answer that, he's a guy. Shadow too. And Zeke is a guy too although that would be kinda funny if he wasn't,…uhh….Shadow…,Reese tried to dye her hair black once but it didn't work…it just stayed blue… and I'm not answering that question either.

**Spectral**: *looks at card* The next question is from Schala85*pauses for dramatic music but it doesn't come* What? No dramatic music. HAHAHAHA! My trap worked! Wait right here Specula…I'll be right back.

**Sound Room**

            Spectral kicks open the door and steps into the room. He raises his flamethrower and looks around. Stuck to the ceiling is Hiltz.

**Spectral**: Hiltz? So you're the one who's been making that annoying music!

**Hiltz**: I came in here to hide from Biowolf. There was someone in here already. When they saw me they ran and I got stuck to the ceiling somehow. 

**Spectral**: Blast! They've escaped once again…but mark my words…I will find this person! 

**Hiltz**: That's great…now…GET ME DOWN FROM HERE!

**Spectral**: if you insist…back to Biowolf you go.

**Hiltz**: What!? Wait! NOOOOOO!

            Hiltz is sucked into a dimension portal as Spectral returns to his desk.

**Spectral**: Sorry about that. Anyway…Schala85 asks, "Have you ever mistaken Sarah for Reese? *looks out for Raven FGs* And does Reese like Raven? I hope so. That way Firefox and the other Raven FGs come and kick her arse into the next millennium. *evil laughter, cough, cough*"

**Specula**: No…who's Sarah? And I think she does.

**Spectral**: Okay…next question's from FireFox. She asks," KEEP RYSS AWAY FROM MY RAVEN!!!! Oh yeah, the question. What is it like when you and Ryss use those mind waves to control people? Do you condone Ryss playing with all those little bugs?"

**Specula**: Okaaaaay…it's fun, and I have nothing against the bugs.

**Spectral**: The next questions comes from Shadow Vixen. She asks, "1#: You are female neh? So, do you have a thing for Shadow?  
2#: Do you think Reese and Raven will be hooking up any time soon?"

**Specula**: 1: yes and…WHO TOLD YOU!?! 2: They might.

**Spectral**: The next one comes from Shiro Amayagi. Here goes…,"*pulls out a tenor sax* I got the blues...my Zoid's all broke...I lost a fight...it was a real joke...will you fix up mah zoid...and fix it up good...you can have some've my Easy Mac...let that be understood...doo bee doo dee dah...thank you, thank you."

**Specula**: Uhh…you want me to fix your zoid? Why?

**Spectral**: Timogrow asks, "Why are you taller than other organoids? Why does the Double sworder change when the Genosaurer doesn't? Why do you like Reese? Why are you so weak against Shadow? Is it okay to call you a LOSER? Is it okay if I take one of your parts to make some toaster? Why is Ambient so stupid unlike Shadow? And are you related to Spectral?  
  
(while later)  
  
Can you give me an autograph? Please? Please? Please?"

**Specula**: I don't hunch over like the others, the Genosaurer does change…didn't you see all the stuff I did to it?, I've been Reese's partner for as long as I can remember, I didn't want to hurt him, NO, NO, how should I know?, NO.

**Spectral**: Do I look like an Organoid? No. I'm an evil super villain, not an Organoid. The next question is from Froz Flame. She asks, "Why is she the ugly organoid? And what's with the weird tusk like things by her mouth?"

**Specula**: I am not ugly and they're for impaling annoying people like you and timogrow!

**Spectral**: There is but one more question. What is made of diamond reinforced neo titanium and about to fall on your head?

**Specula**: I have no idea…

**Spectral**: This! 

            Spectral pressed a button and a cage dropped onto Specula.

**Spectral**: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Only one Organoid left! Ambient, watch out! Spectral's gonna get ya!

**Mr. Censor**: we have to go to a commercial break…

**Spectral**: Oh very well. We'll be back with the Liger Zero after this message.

**Audience**: *cheers*

**Spectral**: *Death Glare*

**Audience**: *silent*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Coming soon to a fic near you!

  
The awards for this very talk show! Awards will be given out for best guest, worst guest, the most evil thing Spectral has done yet and more! Chapter 13 here! You vote! You decide who wins! More information in chapters 11 and 12!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Spectral**: We're back! Bring out the next guest!

            The Liger Zero appears in a cloud of smoke. Spectral's desk and chair rises up to meet it.

**Spectral**: I hope the translator works on you too… Hi Liger!

**Liger**: Hello.

**Spectral**: Okay…the first question is from *looks at flaming card* Maelgwyn. She asks, "YOU ARE SOOOO COOL, but not as cool as Spectral... Can I have you, Please? That Bit Cloud doesn't deserve a perfect Zoid like you. Do you like Marry Champ or Bit? Have you seen Bit like nude? My sister has a thing for you... And If I cant have you, then maybe spectral can... *evil grin*"

**Liger**: Yes, yes I am. Sorry but no…Bit! That Marry Champ scares me…Of course I've seen Bit nude. Sometimes…when we go for a run he leaves his clothes back at the base. That's scary …no he can't…

**Spectral**: *shifty glance* The next question is from HealerAriel. She asks, "I've got lots of questions! Did you choose Bit to be your pilot 'cause he's cute and funny? Are you really a boy Zoid, or does Bit just not know any better? Do you ever see Bit and Leena or Brad and Naomi doing...stuff... that the other humans don't see? What kind of music does Bit listen to, assuming that there's a radio in the cockpit? How can you tell a male and a female Zoid apart? How do Zoids reproduce? Would you let me pilot you? And lastly...did Bit say anything about me to you after our date? *blush* Just wanna know...."

**Liger**: (be warned Schala…) No I chose him because I sensed his great potential. Of course I'm male!. Sure…I've seen a lot more than that…I've seen…Bit and Leena, Brad and Naomi, Bit and Brad, Bit and Jamie, Brad and Jamie, Bit and Brad and Jamie, Bit and Brad and Jamie and Leon, Leon and Brad, Leon and Jamie, Leon and Naomi, Brad and Leena, Jamie and Leena, Naomi and Bit, and Leon and Bit. That's about all…, He listens to strange music and plays it so loudly that even people watching the show can hear it. I won't answer that. Or that, maybe and yeah he mentioned that you were interesting…that's about all.

**Spectral**: Okaaaay… the next questions are from Dragon Vaylor. She says, "me and a friend thinks that u are weak. and stupid and so on and so forth"

**Liger**: Then you and your friend are complete idiots.

**Spectral**: Ah ha… the next question is from Schala85. She asks," Liger Zero, What do you think of Bit? He's a moron, isn't he? Have you ever thought about ditching him for a different pilot? And I'm not talking about me, just someone else. Someone like...Stoller! He'd take good care of you and if he didn't I'd make sure he'd regret it."

**Liger**: Bit's my friend and partner. And NEVER!

**Spectral**:…moving on…the next question is from *looks at stone tablet* Fire Fox. She asks, "Sooo...is it true that all ligers are sterile?"

**Liger**: No.

**Spectral**: The next question is from Shiro Amayagi. He sends this, "Don't you get bored of the same old transformations? You'll need a new one now...I guess I'll give it to you...Liger Zero Blazer. It's red and blue, and comes with blades that shape themselves into wings. Liger Zero Blazer is also MY idea...at least, I didn't have any help...someone else might've come up with a crappy version of it, but mine's the best."

**Liger**: Not really but thanks for the new CAS parts!

**Spectral**: The next question is from Maniac. She says, "all I have to say is that the Liger Zero should watch out.....why....I found Dragon Valor's Liger Zero model and well....its decapitated!!! and also a question for liger...ok do u think u can steal brad for my 3 year old sister...she likes brad and well SHES VERY ANNOYING!!!:"

**Liger**: Okay…you scare me…and no I can't steal Brad.

**Spectral**: Serena says, "What is it like having a hottie like Bit as your pilot? Can you ask him if he will go on a date with me? Please???????? I think you 2 are the coolest. You can come to my house and we can annihilate the whole sixth grade and then blow up my school. And bring Bit with you too if you like.  
You are the coolest zoid in my opinion. You kick major butt. Don't forget to ask Bit to go out with me. see ya. ^_^"

**Liger**: …it's okay…sure I'll ask him, …you're very destructive aren't you?

**Spectral**: I WILL ASK THE QUESTION ON THIS SHOW! Like this one here….from timogrow, "HATE YOU! YOU ARE SOOOO WEAK WITHOUT YOUR CAS! I LIKED YOU AS A BLADE LIGER! NOW YOU'RE WEAK! WEAK AS A MOUSE!"

**Liger**: Why don't you come here and say that to my face you insignificant little rat?

**Spectral**: Okay…the next one is from pink blade liger. She asks, "I wanna know if liger likes bit or if he is having a secret affair with another."

**Liger**: No one but Bit pilots me…

**Spectral**: That's all the questions…

**Liger**: Really?

**Spectral**: yes…so…into the cage you go!

            A giant cage sprung up around the Liger Zero.

**Spectral**: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Today is a great day to be evil! Next Time on the Show we'll have the Wild Eagle and Van Flyheight!

**Audience**: *cheers*

**Spectral**: *holds up Photon Cannon*

**Audience**:  *silent*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Next Time:                                                       

Wild Eagle and Van Flyheight


	11. The Wild Eagle and Van Flyheight

**Spectral's Evil and Insane Zoids Themed Talk Show Type Show**

****

By, Spectral

Insanity comes in many forms this is one of the more pleasant ones…

**Disclaimer**: Spectral doesn't own zoids or its characters. He owns this story and its plot but not Zoids or it characters. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Mr. Censor**: Live from a studio somewhere in Limbo, it's Spectral's Zoid Themed Talk Show! Here's your host, Spectral!

            Spectral appeared in a cloud of smoke. The audience applauded. Spectral tried to quiet them but they wouldn't stop. He tried again with no progress. The audience quickly became silent when Spectral pulled a flamethrower out of subspace.

**Spectral**: Thank you, thank you. Well I've come up with some sort of talk show-like show. It will feature Zoids characters from all three series, some zoid battles, zombies, explosions, maniacal laughter, insanity, and some other zoid related stuff that I'll make up as we go along. That sound good?

**Audience**: Yes!

**One guy in Audience**: No!

**Spectral**: HELLFIRE CANNON!

            The guy was engulfed in flames as Spectral walked over to his desk. He sits in his chair and the buttons of DOOM appear.

**Spectral**: Well before I even ask if there are questions for me…I have a message to pass along for you people. **IF YOU HAVE A QUESTION FOR A CHARACTER WAIT UNTIL IT IS THEIR TURN TO BE ON THE SHOW! DO NOT LEAVE QUESTIONS FOR CHARACTERS WHO WILL NOT BE APPEARING ON THE SHOW IN THE CHAPTER AFTER THE ONE YOU REVIEW. I AM NOT GOING BACK AND SORTING THROUGH ALL THESE REIVEWS FOR QUESTIONS IN THE ****WRONG PLACE! Now... Mr. Censor, are there any questions, pour moi?(yes, I speak French too)**

**Mr. Censor**: Yes…the first one is from…Mistress of All Worlds. She sends these gifts," a box of cookies and a big, giant, bad-ass gun! Their what every super villain needs!"

**Spectral**: Thanks for the cookies and artillery! You can never have too many weapons…or cookies.

**Mr. Censor**: The next question is from…Malegwyn and CW. They say…"CW: I hate you...  
  
Mael: Now, can you PLEASE kill him? I am really tired of the little b'*atd's crap... *growls* Now, since I have guessed you enjoy all things destructive... I have found something for you *digs around room for a tic* Here it is; the perfect Zoid Virus! It can freeze ANY zoid that you may come across and it does work on organoids too...  
  
Question (and Hero worship) for Spectral: You are just too cool? How do you do it! I strive to be just like you everyday... thank you for reading this Spectral; and for that, you get a huge basket of chokkies (Chocolates) and another full of C4 explosives (High Grade)"

**Spectral**: Now I really hope CW wasn't directing that at me because I have an army of VERY angry zombies waiting to attack someone…maybe…thanks for the zoids virus! Now I can finally capture Ambient! BWAHAHAHA!...Ummm…Hero worship doesn't work well with VILLAINS…but thanks anyway. For anyone who wants to be evil like me…just read my newest(and soon to be posted) fic called…**EVIL, DOOM, CHAOS, and other assorted badness on the Fiction Press site the ff.n people set up…**

**Mr. Censor**: That's the last thing we need...more people like Spectral…the next question happens to be from Dark Sniper. He sends this," Just to add to your arsenal, would you like a grenade attachment for your flame thrower? It's full auto btw"

**Spectral**: Sure. New weaponry is always welcome!

**Mr. Censor**: Stop increasing his destructive power! IT'S NOT A GOOD THING! The next question is from…Razor. The question is, "I hope you know that Recoil is now very livid and is now inside the Base Of Doom, and has already destroyed most of the explosives, oh, and she also said that she was going to something else. I forgot what. Anyway I think it had something to do with her overdrive and 'I can't believe it's not butter spray.'"

**Spectral**: Yes I know…I've already restocked the explosives and Recoil is currently trapped inside a giant cube of evil gelatin. You should come pick her up before she melts herself trying to escape…her overdrive just bounces around the inside of the cube…oh and here's the key(why is there a key to a cube of gelatin you ask? Well that's simple. I'm evil! BWAHAHAHAHAHA!) to let her out…it explodes after its been used so be careful…

**Mr. Censor**: Trigger Happy wants to know if you're single…

**Spectral**: Yes…why…

**Mr. Censor**: FireFox*pauses for dramatic music* wants to know if you're giving the five dollars back…

**Spectral**: Yes and I will send this life-like and life-size replica of Raven (GF not CC). Yes...it is AC (And When I say AC I mean VERY AC…*shudders* can you believe they sell that kind of stuff at the place where I work?). MINIONS!

            A giant red and black robot flies out of the shadows and lands. It picks up the box containing the gift for FireFox then flies through a dimensional portal.

**Mr. Censor**: She also wants to know where Shadow went.

**Spectral**: I captured him. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

**Mr. Censor**: Dragon Vaylor apologizes for Maniac…

**Spectral**: *looks over at the four holes in the wall where Maniac drove through* Okay…ZOMBIES!

            Several zombies rise out of the ground.

**Spectral**: Fix the wall…

            The zombies go over to the wall and begin to fix it.

**Mr. Censor**: Amy says, "I send you a long range machine gun with flamethrower attachments! And when will you have Vega, Naomi, or Reese on the show?"

**Spectral**: *attaches new parts to flamethrower* You know, its amazing that no matter how many things I add to this Flamethrower, it still looks the same… Vega, don't know, Naomi, don't know, Reese, Next Chapter.

**Mr. Censor**: Froz Flame says this…"Hello again! Spectral I would like to give you one of my Demon Death Saurer (read chapter 3 of What To Do On A Saturday Night to learn what a demon zoid is) also are you a fan of Yu-Gi-Oh? If u are u should do something like this for the YGO section."

**Spectral**: Demon Zoid! Yay! Yes, I am. I would but the ff.n people got into a tizzy (?) when I tried to.

**Mr. Censor**: Serena wants you to send the Liger Zero…

**Spectral**: Maybe…and only after my evil plot is complete. *shifty glance*

**Mr. Censor**: Vegetto wants to know when Zeke will be on the show…

**Spectral**: Uhh…maybe after I finish my evil plot.

**Mr. Censor**: Shiro Amayagi says this, "Okay, I REALLY hope those people bashing Ambient were just joking...must kill...oh yes, and something I forgot to mention last time, we're partners, so you can have Zeke, Shadow, and Specula, but Ambient is MINE!!! It's only fair." 

**Spectral**: I only need Ambient four about 15 minutes so he can help complete my evil plot. I was going to send him to you any way…once I catch him that is…

**Mr. Censor**: This is the last question…**WHY ARE THERE NEVER ANY QUESTIONS FOR ME?!?**

**Spectral**: Good question…perhaps everyone else can answer that…

*silence*

**Spectral**: Okay…let's bring out the first guest!

**Audience**: *cheers*

**Spectral**: *holds up Bob-omb*

**Audience**: *silence*

**Spectral**: *throws bob-omb into subspace*  Bring out the Wild Eagle!

            The Wild Eagle appears in the chair next to Spectral's desk.

**Spectral**: Hi!

**WildE**: Hi…

**Spectral**: The first question is from Malegwyn and CW. They ask, "How is it to have an alter ego that is a little pussy? I wish I could dump the Wild Eagle into a Zoid and you would rock *Hey you rock now*"

**WildE**: He isn't…and yes, I do rock.

**Spectral**: *sets random cactus monster on fire* The next question is from Schala85. She asks, "Which do you think is better: Stormsworder or Raynos?"

**WildE**: The Raynos is much better!

**Spectral**: Healer Ariel asks, "Hey, you know you're WAY hotter as Wild Eagle than when you're in Jamie mode? And since you're not as shy as Jamie, will you answer some questions that he wouldn't? What kind of girls do you like? Do you think I'm cute? (Answer this carefully... I too have an alter-ego.)Have you ever walked in on any of your teammates doing naughty things? Can you tell me about it in detail so I can have blackmail ready? Pleeeeaase? And, can you take me for a ride in your Raynos? And saying that there's only one seat in the cockpit won't suffice as an excuse not to. You may interpret that however you wish to ^_~ A biento, baby!"

**WildE**: Yes. Maybe…no comment, maybe _I_ haven't seen you. Yes but no details because I tend to join in… No. I don't take passengers.

**Spectral**: *presses random button and an explosion and screams are heard in the distance* the next question is from Dragon Vaylor. She says," u know ur hot!!!! and....ya..thats it..."

**WildE**: Yes. Yes I am.

**Spectral**: Fire Fox *pauses for dramatic music* I'll find that music playing person eventually…any way… Fire Fox asks, "What's it like living in someone's head? Isn't Pierce a little old for you?"

**WildE**: It's like reliving the same memories again and again…and no. Do you have any idea how old _I_ really am?

**Spectral**: Shiro Amayagi asks, "Do you watch Yu-Gi-Oh? Do you know that you're kinda like Yami? Do you play basketball? Have you separated any negatively charged particles to deflect a charged particle gun from destroying the people that your hikari (light side) does all the work for? Am I asking too many questions?"

**WildE**: Yu-gi-what? No…no…no again...and yes.

**Spectral**: Moving on…The next question is from Maniac…(note to self: must install truck-proof walls) She says, "tell Jamie that Dragon Valor is going to have a NEW BOYFRIEND soon....very soon...."

**WildE**: Does she mean me?

**Spectral**: *throws flaming bag of popcorn at Wild Eagle* I will ask the questions! The next one is from…*looks at flaming card* Amy. She asks, "What's it like being the alter ego of Jamie? I think you're much cooler anyway"

**WildE**: It's kinda weird and yes. I am MUCH cooler.

**Spectral**: Froz Flame asks, "Wild Eagle, your kinda like a Yami, no? or I'm a just an Yu-Gi-Oh! obsessed girl? Probably both"

**WildE**: I'm confused…can we move on?

**Spectral**: Very well…sorry Froz Flame but Wild Eagle doesn't seem to know what a Yami is…the next question is from…me. You like to fly right?

**WildE**: Of course.

**Spectral**: Then good bye.*presses button*

            Wild Eagle's chair turns around and he is then catapulted through the window. 

**Spectral**: HAHAHAHAHA! That should hurt!

**WildE**: *stands up* Not really. It was only a two foot drop…

**Spectral**: …*pulls out a mallet and hits Wild Eagle on the head, knocking him out* 

Mr. Censor…

**Mr. Censor**: The painters moved everything again. The window that leads to the 300 foot drop is over there...

**Spectral**: Okay…note to self: harm the painters. MINIONS!

A large red dragon appears.

**Spectral**: Bring him to Dragon Vaylor.*points to the unconscious Wild Eagle/Jamie*

The Dragon picks up Jamie/Wild Eagle and flies through a portal.

**Spectral**: We'll be back with Van Flyhieght!

**Audience**: *cheers*

**Spectral**: *holds up frying pan*

**Audience**: *silence*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

HAHAHAHAHA! Time for a short explanation of the awards show! These will be the categories! There will be 5 nominees in each category. The winner gets a Spectral Award(just a gold Spectral Symbol on a platform) and 500 Evil Points(redeemable at your local evil place or on Black Market E-bay)! You people can vote **NEXT TIME!**

Best Guest

Worst Guest

Funniest Guest

Most Evil Thing Spectral has done so far (on the show)

Best Questions/Review (yes you people will be given rewards too!)

Worst Questions/Review

Most Threatening thing Spectral has done to the Audience

Best Commercial

And we'll all find out who makes that annoying dramatic music plus Spectral will fight 3 mystery opponents in a special battle right in the studio!  So CH13 will be the awards. Be Ready! Oh and did I mention… the whole show will be on **Mountain, Spectral's orbiting space station!**

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Spectral**: We're back!

**Audience**: *cheers*

**Spectral**: *eyes glow*

**Audience**: *silence*

**Spectral**: Okay…bring in Van.

            A Giant robot lands by the door and two smaller ones open it. There's a huge battle going on outside between Van Fan Girls and Fan Boys and Raven Fan Girls and Fan Boys. The giant robot opens fire as a black pick-up truck with the Spectral symbol on the hood and doors drives into the studio. The doors are then slammed shut and barricaded. 

**Spectral**: Okay…not only did I say Van and not Truck but I meant Van Flyheight not Mini-Van. Sheesh…do I have to do everything myself? *snaps fingers*

            The truck is driven off stage as Van appears in a cloud of smoke. He then sits down in a chair next to Spectral's desk.

**Spectral**: Hello.

**Van**: Hi.

**Spectral**: Let's begin with a question from Biowolf *pause for dramatic music*. She wants to know how many papayas you've eaten in your whole life.

**Van**: 163.

**Spectral**: Okay…the next question is from Mistress of all Worlds. She asks, "Do you like Fiona? What was your first kiss? What happened to your mother? Have you ever wanted a different Zoid?"

**Van**: Yes. This is a bit embarrassing but… it was with Zeke. I was having a dream and he leaned in to investigate and…

**Spectral**: Moving on…

**Van**: Okay…she died a long time ago…and no. My Blade Liger is the best!

**Spectral**: *looking at a set of photos* Okay…explain these photos, Flyheight.

**Van**: *looks at photos and sweat-drops*How did you get those pictures. 

**Spectral**: I took them from Shadow when I captured him but…I have a feeling that these photos will make both Raven and Van fan-girls and fan-boys angry or at least slightly disturbed…

**Van**: So you won't let anyone else see them?

**Spectral**: HA! I'm evil remember?! They've already been faxed to Fire Fox and I'm sure that my zombies will deliver them to other people.

**Van**: Can you just ask the next question?

**Spectral**: *Death Glare* Very well…it's from…*looks at cards* Malegwyn and CW. They ask, "have some *quite* descriminating pictures of you and one Thomas Shubaltz doing something quite rude and indecent... I am sending them to my friend Spectral now... And how is it to have a kick ass organoid like Zeke *who is the property of Spectral* and a great liger; but you are a pussy; cute, but a pussy that I killed in my story :-)"

**Van**: Uh…*watches as Spectral looks at the pictures, glares at him, and then sends copies across the internet with an evil laugh* that isn't good…Zeke is great isn't he….WHAT DO YOU MEAN PROOERTY OF SPECTRAL?! The liger's cool too, and why do you hate me?

**Spectral**: *sets a random sofa monster on fire* Okay…the next question happens to be from Schala85*pause for dramatic music*. She wants to know, "Who would win in a battle: you or Bit?"

**Van**: Who's Bit?

**Spectral**: The next question is from…*looks at the cards which have mysteriously turned to stone* Trigger Happy. She asks, "1. Why do you always shout "Mobilize"?  
2. Do you like Fiona?  
3. Does fiona like you?  
4. Do you want to kill Thomas? 'Cause if you do, I can help.  
5. If Raven whould not have been taken by Prozen-dude, do you think that you'd be friends"

**Van**: 1. I can't think of anything else to shout. 2. Yes. 3. I hope so. 4. Not really. 5. Yes.

**Spectral**: The next one's from HealerAriel. She asks, "You realize you and the other guys are just eye candy, right? That said, I can start with the real questions. What do you think about that loser Thomas always trying to scam on your girl, huh? Don't you just want to punch him sometimes? Are you planning to marry Fiona? 'Cause you're like, such a perfect couple. And, can you gimme any dirt on Irvine and Moonbay's relationship? You can tell that they're totally into each other, right? I mean, it's SO obvious. And...do you think I have a chance with Raven? I mean, he kinda blew me off in his interview, but do you think maybe I can convince him that he's desperately in love with me? Yes? No?"

**Van**: No…he's just hopeless. Yes. Yes. No because they'd hurt me. No. He's more likely to kill you than to love you…

**Spectral**: Kill…*drifts off into evil thoughts*

            Several minutes pass before a water balloon hits Spectral, snapping him back into reality.

**Spectral**: *instantly dry* Who threw that?

**RandomGuy**: Me.

**Spectral**: Good bye*presses button*.

            The guy falls into a pit of lava. The floor then closes back up.

**Spectral**: The next question is from Fire Fox*pause for dramatic music*. She asks," Grrrrrr....Are you trying to make the mullet cool again? Did you ever manage to catch the legendary flying papaya?"

**Van**: No and No.

**Spectral**: Lady Anime asks, "What do pappayas taste like and can you give me a papaya. also,can I have the Blade Liger."

**Van**: Uhhh…good? No. All the world's papayas are mine!

 BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!*is hit in head by Spectral*---ouch!

**Spectral**: Don't try to be evil Just answer the questions.

**Van**: *disappointed* Okay…no. The Blade Liger is mine!

**Spectral**: trimogrw wants the Blade Liger…

**Van**: No.

**Spectral**: also," Did u know that Zeke is GAY with Thomas?   
I saw them in the attic of your house."

**Van**: Yes…and it's not just Thomas…

**Spectral**: Shiro Amayagi asks," Why exactly do you have so much of a problem with Raven? He wasn't the murderer that killed your dad. If I'm correct, it was actually Shadow. Jeez, we authors are turning Zoids into a soap opera..."

**Van**: Raven's evil. I have a problem with all evil people. And it was Prozen that caused my father to die, not Shadow.

**Spectral**: Have a problem with evil people do you? Not a smart thing to say on this show. After the questions they'll be a surprise every anti-van person will like…the next question is from, Maniac*looks over at zombies that are still repairing the wall*., She asks, "did u marry Fiona at the end of the series?...and did u know Dragon Valor's older sister thnks u r Jamie..."

**Van**: No. And Dragon Vaylor's sister must be insane,…I'm Van…

**Spectral**: Vegetto asks," Do you love Fiona, can I have Zeke, why do you always get your ass kicked by Raven?"

**Van**: Yes, No, and I don't.

**Spectral**: The next question comes from Amy. She asks, "How manny papias have you eaten in the past year? And what do you do in your spare time?"

**Van**: 68 and work out.

**Spectral**: Froz Flame asks," Your really cool, and your the first Anime person I fell in love with, of course there are many others now... What do you think of Thomas trying to hit on your girlfriend? What's it like fighting Raven? Is it okay if I make the Blade Liger black? I think it would look better. Have you ever thought of becoming evil? At the end of GF, would you say u n' Raven are friends, or at the least, can tolerate each other? By the way, there is a cage waiting for you in F.R.I.T.Z 666....MWWAAHHAAA*hack cough**Ahem*"

**Van**: Thomas gets annoying after awhile. Fun. NO! Yes but this Spectral just shows up and hurts me every time I try to be evil. We tolerate eachother. And I'm not going there…

**Spectral**: *presses button and load roars and screams of terror are heard in the distance* The next question comes from*looks at cards that have now become fuzzy* Serena. She asks," Have you ever hurt yourself jumping out of the Blade Liger's cokpit? And you and Zeke can come over my house somtime just for fun k? Has Thomas ever hurt himself Getting out of the Dibison's cokpit? And has Fiona ever slapped him for being a pervert? And keep an eye on Zeke or else spectral micg try to steal him."

**Van**: Yes, maybe once I find zeke that is. Yes. Yes. Yeah…I'll have to make sure Spectral doesn't steal Zeke.

**Spectral**: Too late. The next question is from ZoidHawk7. He(She?) asks," WHY THE HELL ARE YOU OBSESSED WITH PAPAYAS? WHY?"

**Van**: Why Not?

**Spectral**: Korona asks," What in the world is a payapa? Huh Mr.Payapa boy. Also, will you buy my sister.I'm selling her for 1 cent.I HATE her. Oh, and paypas are dumb:D."

**Van**: A fruit and No.

**Spectral**: The last question is from ShadowWind. HE(She?) asks," Why are you so cool as a little kid and so gay when you grow up? Can I have Zeke, cause I really don't think you deserve him? And can I have your boots cause they're really cool? Oh yeah, can I kill Fiona?"

**Van**: I'm not! No. I'll send you an extra pair, AND NO!

**Spectral**: Okay that was the last question. I will now cause you pain.(this is the surprise)

**Van**: What?!

**Spectral**: *gets up* Through the powers of Evil, Darkness, and Shadow I call upon one of my ultimate techniques! This hand of mine is burning red! It's dark power demands that I destroy you! AN ULTIMATE SPECTRAL FINISHER! THE WINDS OF EVIL! DESTRUCTION CANNON!*flings giant beam of black energy at Van, sending him spiraling into the distance where he explodes upon impact with a distant mountain*That's all! Next time we'll have Leena and O'Connell. See ya!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Next Time:

Leena and Lt. O'Connell


	12. Leena Tauros and Lt O'Connell

**Spectral's Evil and Insane Zoids Themed Talk Show Type Show**

** **

By, Spectral

Insanity comes in many forms this is one of the more pleasant ones…

**Disclaimer**: Spectral doesn't own zoids or its characters. He owns this story and its plot but not Zoids or it characters. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Mr. Censor**: Live from a studio somewhere in Limbo, it's Spectral's Zoid Themed Talk Show! Here's your host, Spectral!

            Spectral appeared in a cloud of smoke. The audience applauded. Spectral tried to quiet them but they wouldn't stop. He tried again with no progress. The audience quickly became silent when Spectral pulled a flamethrower out of subspace.

**Spectral**: Thank you, thank you. Well I've come up with some sort of talk show-like show. It will feature Zoids characters from all four (I'll try with the limited information I have…) series, some zoid battles, zombies, explosions, maniacal laughter, insanity, and some other zoid related stuff that I'll make up as we go along. That sound good?

**Audience**: Yes!

**One guy in Audience**: No!

**Spectral**: *snaps fingers*

            A giant four-armed demon appears, grabs the guy, and pulls him into a fiery portal. The audience looks at each other warily as Spectral walks over to his desk and the control buttons appear.

**Spectral**: Mr. Censor, let us begin the show in the usual fashion. Let's hear the questions for me.

**Mr. Censor: **Very well. The first one comes from Froz Flame. "I am sending you the Tech skill Forever Zero because it is awesome"

**Spectral**: Thanks Froz. Another power to add to my already powerful arsenal! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Next question.

**Mr. Censor**: Trimogrow practically signs his death certificate by sending this so I won't give it to you…after him there's ZoidHawk7. He says, "I give you an arsenal of nuclear weapons and a computer disk full of mind control technology!"

**Spectral**: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! MORE DESTRUCTIVE POWER!

**Mr. Censor**: WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE!?!?! STOP GIVING THE EVIL SUPER VILLAIN BENT ON UNIVERSAL DOMINATION WEAPONS! The next question is from Dragon Vaylor. She ask," can u go get me Cloud from Final Fantasy 7"

**Spectral**: Sure. MINIONS!

            A very large dragon holding an unconscious Cloud appears.

**Spectral**: Well that's time saving…bring Cloud to Dragon Vaylor…and use the door this time.

            The dragon nods and then sinks into the shadows.

**Mr. Censor**: Shadow Wind gives you a grenade launcher part for your flamethrower and wants you to make something horrible and bad happen to Leena.

**Spectral**: I'll see what I can do.

**Mr. Censor**: Maelgwyn says," I have decided to become your evil padawan, and I wish to do anything for your cause! Oh, and I also send this... *waves submissively at death stinger, with Ambient in the cockpit* I locked him in, clever, but not evil enough, right?"

**Spectral**: Ooh. Now I have evil trainees. This could be interesting. Well I posted my **Evil, Doom, Chaos, and other Assorted Badness fic…it should give people some evil ideas. As for the Ambient thing…clever, yes but not evil enough. He just fused with the zoid and ran…**

**Mr. Censor**: Not good…Fire Fox*dramatic music* says," Oh, and do you think it might be possible for me to get Shadow back when you are done with him? Thanks for the Raven thing^__^ *give Spectral a hug without setting him on fire*"

**Spectral**: *on fire anyway* Okay. *puts out fire*

**Mr. Censor**: Vegetto asks," why are you so evil?"

**Spectral**: Well…I just am. Why not?

**Mr. Censor**: Black Fireball asks," Is there a leader to the Van fangirls? If not, can I be the leader of the Van fangirls? I wish to rule SOMETHING..."

**Spectral**: I'm not sure if there is a leader or not…but okay. You now lead the Van Fangirl Army.

**Mr. Censor**: The next questions come from Serena. She asks," did you have to kill Van? And Would you fight with the good guys even though you're evil? And do you like .Hack//Sign?"

**Spectral**: I didn't kill Van. I just seriously injured him. I'd only fight with the good guys if we had a common foe that presented a sufficient threat to both the forces of good and evil. And, of course. .hack//SIGN is awesome.

**Mr. Censor**: Light Angel also wants to learn how to be evil…

**Spectral**: Sure, why not?

**Mr. Censor**: Blade Dragoon says," May I become your student and learn from your evilness? Also, I send a piece for your flamethrower: Multiburn! Use it, and 50 flamethrowers launch from the flame thrower!"

**Spectral**: Sure, three evil students now…and thanks for the flamethrower part. This should be interesting…

**Mr. Censor**: Dark Magician asks," how did you become so evil? I send cookies and a MSCPG (micro super charged particle gun) for your flamethrower. May I become your Padawan?"

**Spectral: **I have a fic coming out that will explain that…and thanks for the cookies and weapon! Sure. Evil Student #4!

**Mr. Censor**: That's all for you…

**Spectral**: Well then…we can move on…*notices and opens envelope* It appears that we have question for you for once.

**Mr. Censor**: REALLY!?!?! Let's hear them!

**Spectral**: Okay… the first one is from Fire Fox. *dramatic music* She asks," What's it like working for Spectral? Do you have good benefits? *hands Mr. Censor a chicken strip*^__^U"

**Mr. Censor**: *eats chicken strip* It's painful…and annoying. It seems like nothing I do to stop Spectral from being evil works. We have great dental and medical plans though.

**Spectral**: The next question happens to be from Blade Dragoon. He asks," WHAT do you censor? here's an Author Magic enhanced Riot Shield. Good luck."

**Mr. Censor**: *hiding behind shield* This show, most of Spectral's fics, and ABC Television programming.

**Spectral**: …next question's from Shiro Amayagi. He asks," Would you feel better if I made you into an anime character and sent you to HealerAriel"

**Mr. Censor**: No.

**Spectral**:  Dark Magician sends cookies…

**Mr. Censor**: *eating cookies*

**Spectral**: Azi the Goddess of Death wants to know if you look like Mr. Game & Watch.

**Mr. Censor**: NO.

**Spectral**: Maelgwyn says," I am giving you this so you will stop whining when you don't get reviews. There you got one, now be quiet! *Throws CW at Censor person.*" and since I don't have CW to throw, I'll just use this really big rock.*throws rock at Mr. Censor*

**Mr. Censor**: *runs and rock follows*

**Spectral**: Now for our first guest…Leena Taros!

**Audience**: *cheers*

**Spectral**: *holds up Wild Furbee*

**Audience**: *silent*

**Spectral**: Wait…*notices new envelope and opens it* *reading…* !!! Okay, Serena, Biowolf*dramatic music*can have Hiltz but I want Ambient. Here's Bit and one of the life-size, life-like, and AC, mannequins of him from the store I work at. MINIONS!

            Several Wild Furbee rise from the ground carrying the boxes containing Bit and the model of him.   
  
  


**Spectral**: Bring them to Serena and retrieve Ambient!

            The Furbees all nod and then jump through a portal. 

**Spectral**: Finally! Now that I have Ambient I can complete my ultimate evil zoid related plot! Now bring out Leena!

            Leena appears in a chair next to Spectral's desk and looks around.

**Spectral**: Hello.

**Leena**: Uh…hi.

**Spectral**: Moving on…the first questions are from Serena! She asks," Do you really like Bit? There are a couple choice episodes that make me think so. Plus I have this comic and It seems that you and Bit like each other, Could you kill Harry for me? If you will I'll give you this nuclear bazooka to do it with. Harry is a pain in the @$$ right?"  
**Leena**: No…and no, I might need him later. And yes, he is a pain.

**Spectral**: And it's fun to cause him pain.

**Leena**: Yes. Yes it is.

**Spectral**: Now I'm going to ask this question from Froz Flame and every single one like it exactly at the same time…(DON'T YOU PEOPLE CHECK TO SEE IF YOUR QUESTION HAS ALREADY BEEN ASKED?!?!?!?!) What are those things on your head?

**Leena**: What? These? They're just overly large and mysteriously floating hair clips.

**Spectral**: Oh…now I must say one thing before proceeding…*on fire* NEVER DO THAT AGAIN!!! If it's a question like that that you know everyone else is going to ask…DON'T ASK IT! Now…we're going to move on and I'm going to calm down*not on fire*. The next question's from Trimogrow. Here's what he wants to know, "Can you sing white America? Can PLEASE wear more clothes? Can I have your Gunsniper?"

**Leena**: No, What, and NEVER!

**Spectral**: Thought so. Zoidhawk7 says that he could take over the world in a few days if he had a million soldiers like you. Now ya see…that's not true. You'd have to go through me and I'm near freaking invincible and ultimately evil so you wouldn't stand a chance. Oh…he also threatens your life if you don't give him your Gunsniper.

**Leena**: Bring it on birde!

**Spectral**: Lil Shooz wants to know why you're psychotic.

**Leena**: Why not?

**Spectral**: Exactly. Now, Fadeaway Windwaker asks (another question that will be answered ONLY ONCE!), " Why are you so possessive about your stupid food? Do you realize that the rest of your team hates you?"

**Leena**: Well how would you feel if someone always ate the treats you bought specifically for yourself? And they don't hate me. They'd better not if they know what's good them. 

**Spectral**: *with block of ice instead of card* Well, Healer Ariel asks, "You like Bit, don't you? Admit it, you do! Otherwise you wouldn't always frolik around in front of him in nothing but a towel. Oh, and you're cool, so do you wanna be my buddy? Oh and here's a picture of me to give to Wild Eagle. Thankies! Oh and what's it like being on a team with three cuties like Bit, Brad, and Jamie? You must have to fight all the fangirls off to protect the boys! Okies, bye!"

**Leena**: No I don't like Bit! He barges in on my showers all the time! Sure…as long as you don't steal my food or shoot down my targets! Spectral already sent it to Wild Eagle…wherever he is…, Bit is not cute, Brad's okay, and I guess you could say Jamie's cute, I don't fight the fangirls for them. I fight the fangirls because its fun to blow them up!

**Talos**: They're all cute! And they'll all be mine!

**Leena**: What?!?! What happened to Spectral?

**Talos**: Never mind him. No one can have Bit, or Brad, or Jamie, or Van, or Irvine, or O'Connell, or Raven, or Leon, or Vega…or…

            Spectral appeared next to his desk tapping his foot on the ground. Talos smiled sweetly and tried to look innocent. Spectral shook his head and then pressed a button on the edge of the desk. Talos was catapulted through the ceiling and disappeared into the horizon.

**Talos**: I'm blasting off once again!

            Spectral sat back down and picked up the cards again.

**Spectral**: Well now that Talos has been dealt with we can move on. Darth Anthony asks, " 1: Why are you always mad at Bit? Is it because you're PMSing all the time?

2: Do you like Bit or not?

3: **Mr. Censor**: CENSORED BY ME!

4: **Mr. Censor**: This too! *Spectral knocks Mr. Censor into next Thursday*

5: Will you go on a date with me? If you refuse, I'll destroy your Gunsniper because I'm a Darth! Darth's are supposed to be evil!"

**Leena**: Urge to kill reviewers …rising….

**Spectral**: Maelgwyn asks, " Do you like Brad, cause Bit's a moron. Oh and here's some photo's for you …see Doc's the cookie thief!:

**Leena**: *looking at photos…* He shall pay…oh and Brad's okay…

**Talos**: *from a distance* But he's mine!

**Spectral**: Fire fox wants to know if you can fly with your strange hair clips…

**Leena**: I haven't tried yet…

**Spectral**: Black Fireball wants to know if you'd really beat up your father.

**Leena**: of course I would!

**Spectral**: And if you wouldn't I would. Shiro Amayagi asks, " What would it take for you to go out on one date with poor Harry? Oh and where did you get your Weasel Unit? I_want_one."

**Leena**: I'd go out with him…when I need to manipulate him…and I got the Weasel Unit at my local Evil Mart.

**Spectral**: Blade Dragoon asks, "Wear do you get all that ammo? Oh, and what is that round thing on the back of your zoid? And how much ammo do you use in one battle? "

**Leena**: I get my ammo and the local Evil Mart! And that's a radar/targeting dish. A lot.

**Spectral**: Dark Magician3 desires to know if you're having an affair with Bit.

**Leena**: Desire to destroy reviewers reaching critical levels…

**Spectral**: Amy sends you a crate of ammo and asks, " What's it like being a trigger happy zoid pilot?"

**Leena**: It's very fun.

**Spectral**: mel wishes to know" Why do you like to waste ammo and do you hate the guys on your team?"

**Leena**: I don't waste ammo! And I don't hate them.

**Spectral**: Next, my fave Thomas Schubaltz (???) asks, " Why do I hate you? Why are you so in love with your cookies? Why aren't you nice to Harry?"

**Leena**: How should I know!?! I am not in love with my cookies I just don't like it when people steal from me. I am nice to Harry…when I need to be.

**Spectral**: Well that seems to be all the time we have for Leena…*pulls out detonator*. And now…*with strange British accent and dramatic background* You are out of time. Good bye. *presses detonator*

            Leena's chair exploded and she was hurled into the distance. 

**Spectral**: We'll be back with Lt. O'Connell and more guards after the break!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Time to Vote. You may cast only **one vote per category** and no "or" answers. Now…I might also add that since the next show is an award show…there will be no questions needed from you. I have them pre-prepared (that's another reason it took so long to get this up…) for each person if they win. Now…here are the nominees! (note that these were chosen by E-307, Talos, Mr. Censor, and Demon Notebook)

**Best Guest**:

Harry Champ

Raven

Hiltz

Prozen

Van Flyheight

**Worst Guest**:

Thomas Schubaltz

Moonbay

The Judge

Brad Hunter

Ambient

**Funniest Guest**:

Thomas Shubaltz

Prozen

Raven

Karl Shubaltz

Shadow

**Most Evil Thing Spectral has done so far (on the show) :**

Harry's Zombie Fight

Torture the guy from the Audience

Harm the person concerned with the guests' safety

Make the guests play dangerous games

Make you all wait so long for an update

**Best Questions/Review:**

Serena

Fire Fox

Biowolf

Blade Dragoon

Shiro Amayagi

**Worst Questions/Review:**

Trimogrow

Azi: Naruto's Twin Sister

Geno

Tyranizard

Vegetto

**Most Threatening thing Spectral has done to the Audience**:

Bazooka

Flamethrower

Meglo-Max

Furbee

Frying Pan

**Best Commercial**:

Ch1

Ch5

Ch7

Ch10

Ch12

Okay! That's all of them! Once again…these were all chosen by my friends so don't get mad at me…it wouldn't be safe for you all…anyway…on with the show!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Spectral**: Welcome back!

**Audience**: *cheers*

**Spectral**: HADOKEN!

BOOM

**Audience**: *silent and extra crispy*

**Spectral**: That's better. Now moving along…

            A gang of imps appear. Spectral looks over at them and then over at the audience. Then once again.

**Spectral**: What the hell are you supposed to be?

**Imps**: We're imps.

**Spectral**: And what has possessed you to appear before me?

**Imps**: We wanna fight!

**Spectral**: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! You pathetic fools! I have powers that you could not even begin to fathom!

**Imps**: Alone we may be mere imps but together we are…

            All the imps jumped into the air and started glowing. Then they all fused into a large monster that looked like someone crossed a werewolf with an imp.

**???**: Imporor!

**Spectral**: Creative. But, now…*holds up glowing ball of energy* its time to die. DESTROYER SHOCKWAVE! 

            Spectral smashed the ball of energy into the ground and a giant wave of destruction spread. When all the dust and smoke had cleared, the audience got out from under their seats and Mr. Censor reappeared from behind his new shield. Spectral dusted himself off but there was no sign of Imporor.

**Mr. Censor**: Overkill much?

**Spectral**: Well the imps are gone ain't they?

**Mr. Censor**: You could've killed the audience with that blast!

**Spectral**: Yeah… but I didn't.

            The studio was instantly repaired and Spectral sat back down behind his desk. 

**Spectral**: Somebody go retrieve O'Connell…

            A giant skeleton bird flew in and dropped O'Connell into a chair next to Spectral's desk.

**Spectral**: Greetings.

**O'Connell**: Uhh…hello…where am I?

**Spectral**: SILENCE! Just answer the questions or be vaporized!

**O'Connell**: Okay…

**Spectral**: The first one comes from the one known as mel. She asks, " 1: What do you think of Herman? 2: Did you hate Van and his friends when you first saw them? 3: Have you ever met Van's father? What was he like?"

**O'Connell**: Herman's my commanding officer, no they just seemed like normal annoying spies, and no but I think Herman has…

**Spectral**: Moving along…the next question comes from Black Fireball. She asks, " Is your hair naturally that color or did you just dye it? Are you related to Reese?"

**O'Connell**: My hair's always been this color and I am in no way related to the blue devil.

**Spectral**: *invisible* Shiro Amayagi asks this! *activates tape recorder* "Would you like to star in my new movie? Your hair is just TOO perfect to pass up! Who's your hair stylist? Just curious." *turns off tape recorder*

**O'Connell**: Uhhh…sure…call my agent…and my hairdresser is Barbara from "New Helic City Hair"

**Spectral**: The next question is fr--- hold that thought…*is attacked by several rapid ferrets*

***Please stand by***

**Background noise**: DIE! Die you Rodents of the Underworld! BWAHAHAHAHAHA! BURN! METEO!

BOOM!!!!  
  


            The screen shakes and when the dust clears, everything's back to normal except…

**Spectral**: *on fire* Okay…now where was I? Oh yes…the next question comes from the reviewer that calls themselves Razor. They ask, " I was wondering why you always blush every time you go near Jewel, or someone brings her up as a topic of conversation? And then you always turn a bright crimson red and deny it when someone asks you about it?"

**O'Connell**: *blushing* No reason…

**Spectral**: Quite. Shadow Vixen *screams heard in background* Now what the Hell was that? Any way, she asks, " "Do you know you're really unappreatiated, but still incredibly cute? I love your hair! Do you dye it? Why's it always on one side of your head? What's the best and worst thing about being a soldier? I LOVE YOU!!!"

**O'Connell**: Yes I knew that. Nope…and it's all an illusion…The best is being in charge and getting to pilot the cooler zoids…the worst…looking like I do with communal showers…and thank you!

**Talos (from the distance)**: But he's mine!!!

**Spectral**: Moving along and ignoring my crazy friend…Trimogrow asks, "Can you sing without me? Can I have your military base? And why do you always hang out with Herman even if you're a Captain?"

**O'Connell**: I've never sung with you so yes, NO, and that is classified information.

**Spectral**: my fav Thomas Schubaltz asks, " Why are you so dang cute? You aren't mean to Thomas are you? And what do the marks on your cheeks signify? Pikachu?"

**O'Connell**: I just am. Uhh…who's Thomas…and I don't know what they symbolize…and what in the world is a Pikachu?

**Spectral**: I just can't resist…*jumps up on desk* Prepare for Trouble and Make it Double! To infest the world with devastation! To conquer all peoples in every nation! To fight the powers of light and love! To extend my power to the stars above! I am…Spectral! The Master of darkness, blasting off with evils might! Surrender now or say good night! *strikes dramatic pose!*

**Audience**: *cheers*

**Spectral**: *draws Amon Blade* KAZA NO KIZU!

**Audience**: *Silent and Mega Crispy*

**Spectral**: My arch-nemesis asks," How did your hair turn blue? How did it feel to get blasted by all those attacks in Elemental Scatter? FR dumped Jewel and she was wondering if you were available for a date. o-O"

**O'Connell**: It has always been blue! It hurt a lot! Sure! I'll call her!

**Spectral**: One of my new evil students, Maelgwyn asks," How does it feel to be one of the most underrated and insignificant characters in CC/GF? I've sent Spectral some incriminating pictures of you and a certain Republican major. And finally, why do you fly the Pteres? They really, really, ****."

**O'Connell**: It's not good…I fly the zoids they give me…and what pictures?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

**Spectral**: These ones…that need censoring. Extreme censoring…

**Mr. Censor**: Someone call for me?

**Spectral**: No. The Fire Fox *dramatic music* asks, " Why did you join the army? If the shortest distance between two points is a line then why does waiting in one take so long?"

**O'Connell**: I joined the army because Herman joined the army, and…

**Spectral**: I'll handle this one…it takes so long because I command it to be so! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! *evil music plays and lightning strikes* Well…now that we're out of time…I have one more thing to do…Knock Knock.

**O'Connell**: Who's there?

**Spectral**: Shocking.

**O'Connell**: Shocking who?

**Spectral**: Shocking you! *presses button!*

            O'Connell was electrocuted and then thrown out the window. 

**Spectral**: See ya all next time people!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Next Time: The award show!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Okay…

Maelgwyn

Dark Magician3

Blade Dragoon

Light Angel

Cerberus

You people who wanted to learn the ways of evil from me… you've given me a great idea. Go to my fic called "The Council of Evil" and leave a review containing to following information.

  
Character Name: 

Appearance:

Age: 

Basic Weapon of Choice (like sword or staff or guns, nothing advanced (like Amon Blade)…I'll handle that):

Personality:

Dramatic Entrance:

Dramatic Exit: 

That is all. Now I'm off. *disappears in a cloud of smoke*


End file.
